Monday, November 28, 2005

Scrumptious Kuih Cara

I love going to blogs that depict pictorial steps of making a dish. Some have managed to make the whole process of cooking a rather elaborate dish look so easy and 'do-able' for people like me who prefer simple and fast cooking like stir-frying!

Below is a pictorial recipe of 'Kuih Cara Manis' which is best taken hot and downed with a cup of hot tea on a balmy evening on the verandah, with the sea-breeze puffing gently in the air.

Kuih Cara is a Malay delicacy that uses a flour mixture and is cooked in a patterned iron or brass mould that can make 8 in a go. This kuih comes in 2 varieties, you can make it plain sweet, just by dropping some sugar in the center or savoury, by adding a mixture of spiced minced meat mixture.

Here is an authentic recipe of Kuih Cara Manis. You can be sure of getting good results if followed correctly unlike some recipes you get in some Malay magazines. Yes, I have been duped many a time by those half-hearted recipes ! I believe we Malays have this bad habit of not wanting to part with our knowledge especially old traditional recipes. Thus, when they give out those recipes, they would purposely miss out one or two ingredients or one or two vital steps in the methods! Sheesh!


125 gm plain flour (cap wau can do)
250 ml santan (buy the commercially prepared ones, easy)
1 egg
a tinge of green color
a dash of salt
sugar to sprinkle in the centre (about 1/4 tsp for each kuih)


1. Mix all the ingredients together, manually. You don't need a mixer for this. If the mixture is not smooth, kindly strain.
2. Meanwhile heat up the mould on the stove. Slather it with some cooking oil to prevent sticking

3. Place a ladle-ful of the mixture to almost fill each mould

4- Sprinkle about 1/4 tsp of sugar in the center of each mixture

5. Cover and cook about 5 mins or till it browns.

p.s. Such coincidence!!Has has entred a similar entry on Lepat Pisang Acheh. Her entry is better as it is made from her own grown pisang and kelapa. And her kitchen is comparable to Martha Stewart's!! Mine is so mediocre!!!

Sunday, November 27, 2005

The Thai Connection

iKelah and I were having fun bantering at Pycnogenol's blog, writing in the language we managed to pick up albeit just a little, during our first year in varsity.No we were'nt in the same class as he was a year senior. I badly wanted to take Arabic as my elective subject then but I was amongst the last to cue (I hate to wait in line!). As the Arabic class was already full, I was only left with the Thai class. Having no choice, I registered. iKelah too faced the same predicaments but he opted for English Translation in one semester and Thai in another. So I can boast that my Thai is much, much better than his! Ehehe.

Thai is a fairly easy language to pick up, a bit like Malay where the words are spelled according to the sound. We had Khun Serm Suk as our teacher, a motherly lady. So for every lesson both semesters, we drilled on the basics of the language, talking like pre-school children. 'Khun jak pai nai kha?' where are you going to?'Chan jak pai rong rem' I am going to the cinema. The Thais must love going to the movies as this was one of the many oft-repeated sentences we learn everyday!

And one of the percularities of Thai language is the soft melodious intonation that accompanies it. Kun Serm Suk would time and again stressed that we had to learn that aspect too or else our Thai would only be half-baked, so to speak!

Ours was a small class, about 15 I think. The boys were always the cheeky and adventurous ones, making daring statements like 'I am going to the cinema with my girlfriend tonight'or "I love my girlfriend so much as she's pretty' in what little Thai vocabulary they possess.They were never shy to try making sentences whenever they acquire new words.They always turn out sounding so funny and most of the time we were laughing our heads off making Khun Serm Suk all the more exasperated! And most of the time, these boys would put on a straight, serious face ! They are such clowns, I tell you! We girls prefer safe , mundane statements like 'I am going to the library now', 'How many brothers and sisters have you?''I love eating rice with Tom Yam' or "what day is today?" Yes, we girls always play it safe.

iKelah related to me on how he would use his standard answers whenever Serm Suk asked him to make sentences. It goes like this : 'Kun sebai di krab? Pom sebai . Kun phut pha sa thai krab? Pom phut pa sa thai mai keng. Pom put pha sa thai nit noy." Translation: How are you? I am fine. Do you speak Thai? I dont speak good Thai. I speak a bit of Thai." Another standard answer of his when he was lost for words would be 'Pom mai kao jai, pom phut pha sa thai nit noy'. Translation: I don't understand, I speak little Thai'.

So Pycno and Bea are going to Bangkok this December. Since they don't know Thai 'sepatah haram', I , drroza, am being kind enough *coughs* to offer my service as intepreter for them *coughs*. As the song goes, "all my bags are packed, I'm ready to go..."

Speaking of Bangkok, iFos went there alone (was it 2 yrs ago, Fi?) and met up with my sis,OG. OG requested that iFos help babysit her youngest daughter whilst she accompanied the eldest for a swimming meet. As they had travelled from Beijing, iFos had to travel alone from here. That was iFos', first major travel alone. Alhamdulillah, all went fine.

I take this opportunity to wish Pycno and Bea, a happy trip with their whole jingbang except for.........(can't say who!!). To you-know-who, I hope you are not feeling dejected for being left behind! *chortle*

Below is iKelah's Thai class picture taken then. ( iKelah is known to be a person who takes photos and keeps them for old time sake and I am not, so that's why I have no pics to share!) Many in the picture have become renowned figures. One of them is the President Of Mercy. One is a plastic surgeon (HOD Surgical Dpt USM). One is successful diversified businessmen. One is manager of Medic Online.One is HOD of O&G UPM. One is Consultant Paediatrician. And one is a professional Blogger. heheheh. And the list goes on....

Thursday, November 24, 2005

A Good Husband, He Is Not!

Occasionally I enjoy sitting down with my Sumateran maid and listen to her gossip about her family back home. She's from Padang and I would say not from a poor family. She doesn't have to work if she wants to. That explains why my maid can be a bit high and mighty at times, acting like she's the boss. She came here many years ago to visit her sister who is married to a local in Dengkil, Bangi. I am not sure what exactly transpired but she later decided to work. As she has no formal education, becoming a house-helper was the best option. After working in several households, she landed in mine when Aliah, my 14 year old daughter was 4 mths old. That explains why Aliah is so attached to her and she to Aliah. Their relationship I shall not delve now as it summons a complete whole entry.

So it was during lunch few days ago that my maid told me the sad story of her niece in Dengkil, who got married more than a year ago, to the same guy whom she got engaged, broke off and reconciliated. He was a low-ranked army personel. She, holding a diploma, works initially at KLIA as ticketting clerk, later switching jobs from a firm to another. Thus, she managed to save some money to get herself a car and what nots. Their marriage was done in a rush and never approved by her mother (my maid's sister). After some misunderstanding (between the niece's husband and my maid's sister), they left the house and lived at her grandma's nearby.

Gradually, the husband showed his true colour. He now, controls her car, sending her to work and at other times asking her to take the bus whilst he uses her car full time, guiltlessly! They lodge at her grandma's without paying any pittance, not even for provisions. Since, the grandma has old issues with the girl's mother, the guy takes the opportunity to vilify his mother in law even more! He even forbids her from visiting her parents and if she defies, he'll give her hell of a time. On the times that she is back home at her mother's she'd gorge her food down as though she hasn't had any meals for months. She would also requests her youger sister (who has done well in studies and just started work as an engineer) to buy her favorite fast food (McDs and such) which she used to enjoy prior marriage. This really breaks her mother's heart! And now, unfortunately (as I see it) she is a few months pregnant! During raya she secretly went back to her mom's only to get some severe tongue lashing from him! Masyallah! Worst still, the latest I heard, she has pawned all her jewelleries, on his insistence.

It's truly mind-boggling to think that a man can shamelessly behave in this unbecoming manner! When a girl marries, she dreams of being protected by the man whom she calls husband. She dreams of a life being provided for. If he is rich, he'll shower her with wealth. If not, he'll do his best to make her comfortable. But when a man marries to only make the wife miserable and having the nerve to even take her belongings from that is blatant wife-abuse!

Even as I sat listening to my maid narrate this sad, sorry, story, I was huffing and puffing, interjecting off and on, "eh, dahsyat nya!", "jahat punya laki!", "tak guna!","mintak cerai je la!". And mind you, my maid is no story-teller. But her facial expressions, her angry tones and palpable angst were enough for me to conclude that this was a marriage not meant-to-be! Suffice to say, after hearing it I was ready to clobber the guy on his head if I had the opportunity to be near him!

Haven't we heard enough of such stories where men abuse their wives mentally? How could these monsters walk around without any guilty conscience whatsoever? Don't they harbor the slighest emotions of pity towards their wives? Are they human in the first place?

Can a wife ask for 'fasaqh' in this sort of condition? I know, some would say that it's going to be difficult because he doesn't physically abuse her. But isn't this misery he had given her enough to grant one?

Being a doctor I am privy to many husband-wife tales which so often can be very repugnant and a bit hard to swallow. I have dealt with wives coming with bruises, hematomas and periorbital eodema, beaten severely by their husbands. Some would divulge with their marital problems, eventhough their initial complain was non-related. Recently I heard of a young wife whose husband wouldn't want to follow her back to her parents' place for her melenggang perut ceremony (she's pregnant with their first child) as it meant he had to spend raya there. So she had to hitch a ride in a friend's car. Imagine!

And for the umpteenth times, we've heard of men neglecting and even abusing their first wives the moment they are hooked with a second! Of course, I am not against polygamy. It's the men who practice it according to their whims and fancies that paint a bad name to it.

Each time I relate to iKelah, the misfortunes of my female patients and friends with regards to their abusive husbands, he would unfailingly point out that these are lessons from Allah swt for me. He would suggest that I 'muhassabah' myself and be grateful that I am being endowed with such a caring and thoughtful husband! (Ok, ok I get your point!)

My heart goes out for all the women who painfully suffer from abusive husbands.......

Monday, November 21, 2005

Of Monsoon, Goats, Pengeras and Fellow-Bloggers

Today we're into the second day of non-stop heavy pouring rain. If it really rained cats and dogs, the humans in Kuantan will have to migrate and let the overflowing canines and felines rule the town! Yesterday, the whole of Sunday, persisted in a gloomy mode, dull and so very wet! The rain poured relentlessly, sometimes hard, loud and thrashing, sometimes soft, monotonous and drizzling, alternatingly. But never the sun shined a single minute, never! At times, the eeirie sounds of monsoon wind hit the rattling window, sounding so much like a human voice trying to scare little kids away. Even the sea-waves wanted a part in this monsoon 'play', culminating into a few feet high and hitting the beach with full vengeance, 'daboooosh!'

The whole house was cold and damp. I needn't switch on the fan at all and wrapped myself with the new Pashmina ikelah bought during his volunteer stint in Mansehra, whole day long. The chill penetrated my bones , brrrr! We went all over the house, like two lost Pashtuns, me and Luqman, :)), tightly wrapped in the shawls. Since the Pashminas were still new, the wool was rather prickly to my sensitive skin and I started scratching as though I have slathered belacan all over me! It even had the 'hamis' smell of 'bakri', still!

In the evening, as the weather got gloomier and darker with no sign of the rain ending its pouring act, I suddenly thought of my fellow-bloggers and how the weather was in their part of the world. So I sent an sms to Pycnogenol, Inositol, Beloved and Nurelhuda, telling them about the rain and all. Only Beloved replied. Apparently she was in an even worse state of gloom as she had her head under a pile of exam scripts that needed meticulous marking to maintain her clear conscience if she failed anyone. To dear Beloved, I ask Allah swt to ease your burden and may you accomplish your mission fast.

*this is the pengeras Kenakelayan gave me to uncover the identity of Pycnogenol~

iKelah had to work till seven yesterday, so we let the hours sail through the cold weather, doing our business (read: eating, reading, putting the room in order, reading the 'pengeras'*, solat, eating again, blogging), patiently waiting for him to come back. Once he reached home, we prayed Maghrib together and set off for dinner outside as promised to celebrate Luqman's UPSR results. No he didn't get 5As. He got only 4 but I am proud of him nevertheless. Alhamdulillah!

On the way back, we decided to stop at Kenakelayan's place ( her parents' actually). So we got to meet the baby goat! Her parents have ventured into the business of rearing goats and cows in their small farm at Paya Pasir, Chenor, Maran. This poor baby goat lost his mum after his delivery and he had to be bottle-fed. Che Ma (kenakelayan's mom) tried forcing another mother-goat to foster and breast-feed him but alas, it seems the concept of fostering is alien in the 'kambing'-dom (to quote kenakelayan) and he was literally 'kicked' out! Thus, they have to bring him back to Kuantan, tying him next to Sox's cage. Expectedly, Sox (an 8 yr old Siamese cat with beautiful big, marble-like eyes, dark brown body and white 'socks' and 'gloves', hence the name Sox) eyed the new addition to the family, with severe suspicions.

I managed to feed Bing Bing (yes, that's Kenakelayan's name for him) with his favorite grass (a cross between lalang and tebrau) and 'curi'curi' stroke his white fur. I can see why Che Ma and Che Pa have fallen in love with these caprine creatures. They are as lovable as cats are! Now if only I can make it lie on my lap, that'll be a difficult feat to accomplish I bet!

As I finished typing this entry, I was starting to feel relieved as the rain began quieting down, pelting its last drop when suddenly, a new thunderous shower began to fall again with shameless vigor!! Ah well, as the saying goes " if you can't beat 'em, join 'em!" So let's snuggle and cuddle up together, with Pashmina shawls, wooly blankets and all! And savor the cool 'wintry' scene, ala Malaysia! Hot cappuccino anyone?

p.s. Latest on the weather condition here: it's still raining and the water level is rising. The small river that meanders through the wetland behind my house has overflowed and whole marsh is filled with a sea of water! Below is the view from Luqman's bedroom. I pray to Allah swt that the water-level won't get worse.

Thursday, November 17, 2005

From A Mother To Her Son

I am afraid I have done undue injustice to my eldest son by associating the term metrosexual with him. Eventhough I did it in jest, I sense his dislike and hurt. Thousand apologies Muhammad! I didn't mean to put you in bad light.

Muhammad is my third offspring and my first boy. So after two girls, it was a relief to find that I finally gave birth to a boy! You see, I come from a family of all girls and I was getting worried that I might follow the same trend. Besides, I had this feeling that ikelah's family was also getting 'fidgety' eventhough no words were spoken in the open. Since both of us are the eldest, it's a natural misconception that we needed at least a boy to 'carry' the family's name, so to speak. But we all know that is not true!

His birth was somewhat special. It was the day for my final clinical professional exams and I was 38 weeks , heavily pregnant with Muhammad. Thought I could go through exams without any hitch. But that was not to be. Early in the morning I detected the first 'show'. I cried! I prayed to Allah swt that everything would be ok. I restricted my movements so as not to accelerate the labour. My exam was in the afternoon. 2 hrs prior, I started having contractions. Mild ones.

I walked slowly to the ward and started examining my patient for the exam. The kind patient commented "you're feverish, are you ok?" I just smiled. The contractions were getting stronger and the lapse shorter. I kept my cool. I had Prof Khalid and an Australian Paediatrician as my examiners and despite my condition, I did well, alhamdulillah. Inside I was burning! Imagine, I was in labour, pain and everything but I had to control or I would lose out! Once over, I almost ran! Ikelah rushed me to Pusrawi and I gave birth to Muhammad an hour later! Phew! Never mind that I got a lashing from the Obstetrician for doing the 'stunt'. I was relieved that the baby was safe! But with a small price though! As I had not prepared the few hours prior to labor in the usual manner, instead of lying down I was standing and delaying the birth to a certain extent, and Muhammad was already 'drilling' his way through the birth canal, this caused him to develop a small 'cephalohematoma' on his scalp! Sorry Muhammad! Could this be the cause of him to be mildly dyslexic when he was small? Wallahu'alam.

Having Muhammad was a great joy! I loved him so much that I even said this once, "I will still continue to love him as much, or perhaps even more, even if I get more children". When I was having a rough time emotionally he protected me in his childish way. You see, as I was still studying, my late MIL (may Allah swt bless her soul) helped me bring up my 2 eldest girls. For this I can't thank her enough. Both MIL and FIL were of great help and they helped ease my burden tremendously. But of course, there was bound to be frictions between us as it involved emotions of love between a doting grandma and her 2 grandchildren. Muhammad helped me through this tumultous period . His caring presence gave me hope that I could still be a good mother. And for that I thank him.

My momentous time with Muhammad would be when I accompanied him to get his SPM results and he turned out to be the best student of his school. Words can't describe the glorious feeling that flowed in my veins that day and that feeling persisted for days! I was in cloud nine! To quote 'kenakelayan' who jokingly asked me ' so are you putting on that silly grin still?' Maybe I was, but who cares how silly I looked! I was simply elated.

Now that he is turning into a fine adult, at times, like all adolescents, he tends to do things that incites the worrying old me. The slightest wrong he does, hurts me. At times like these, I'd reminisce the days that he was the apple of my eye, comforting my injured soul, helping me lick my wound. Those were the days....

To Muhammad, thank you for sticking by me eventhough you were too young to understand anything.You've been my saviour through thick and thin. And remember that I will always be there for you too!

Love, Mak.

p.s. ever had the experience of crying whilst reading your own writing? This one did ....

A Beautiful Bracelet From Istanbul

By now, you should all be familiar with Boogey, my beloved BIL. He used to be a native of Istanbul. He studied and worked there for 16 years. Recently, he went 'balik kampung' to this beautiful, exotic and partly medieval city (how do I know since I haven't been there, you asked? Well, some writers can describe a city beautifully and so far, the vision I get of Istanbul is explicitly breathtaking and I can't wait to set eye on the Blue Mosque....hmm insyallah when my backpacking tour gets kicked off!)

The bracelet above, he bought for me whilst he was there. Rather heavy but I think it's beautiful and eye-catching. And it makes a good conversational piece. So for those easily tongue-tied individuals, take heed. Next time, going for a social meet, wear something extraordinary and you'll have no problem starting a chat!

To Boogey, thank you for remembering me in your travels.

p.s. this bracelet has an exquisite background. Maybe Boogey can enlighten us?

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

What My Birth Date Means

Your Birthdate: February 18

You are a cohesive force - able to bring many people together for a common cause.

You tend to excel in work situations, but you also facilitate a lot of social gatherings too.

Beyond being a good leader, you are good at inspiring others.

You also keep your powerful emotions in check - you know when to emote and when to repress.

Your strength: Emotional maturity beyond your years

Your weakness: Wearing yourself down with too many responsibilities

Your power color: Crimson red

Your power symbol: Snowflake

Your power month: September

Got this from ubisetela's blog (cilok!)

Friday, November 11, 2005

My Grousing Thoughts

Actually, we have just lived in this present house since last April, so it hasn't been a year yet. This place we're living in is in a transition sort of phase. Originally it is a village, a fishing village to be specific. It is situated less than 5 km from town. Probably I can class it as an urban sprawl. It is a big kampung with many empty lands belonging to various family heirloom. So since the older generations have passed away and their children preferring to live elsewhere, we see these lands being sold to housing developers and turning them into housing estates. So we have modern homes situated awkwardly in the midst of wooden kampung-style houses. And we have an urbanized society living in a backdrop of simple minded and very laid-back folks. Now, this contrasting and contradicting socio-economic scenario can raise a helluva problem if we don't take proactive and cautious measure. I, for one, am already feeling the heat of the rather unbalanced social strata between the original kampung people and the 'migrating' society. After the many occurences of thefts (iKelah's 1k bicycle, our Turkish Angora cat, iKelah's working shoes and today 2 small kids blatantly snitched our cute kitten right under our noses), some minor disturbances and the recent car accident, I am begining to question whether we have made the correct choice of moving here.

I am beginning to notice how the youngsters here behave. How they spend their free-time, idling around, speeding away on their motorbikes, without helmets, embracing the couldn't-care-less attitude to the fullest. They are so simple-minded and I am sure they treat their school education lightly. Most of these youngsters will grow up acquiring menial jobs that don't require any basic qualifications at all.

This laid-back attitude too must have some contribution to their affinity towards drug addiction. Yes, this area that I now call home is the 'sarang' or 'lubuk' for drug-addicts. The fact that it's a fishing village doubles the inclination as it's rampant amongst fishermen to indulge in drug addiction especialy when they are at sea.

You see, here we are, the urbanized migrants, trying to assimilate ourselves amongst the kampung folks, trying to be nice to them but alas, many of them have pre-concieved thoughts about us. Us, living in nice brick houses and driving big cars may prove too much for them and hence magnifying their envy towards us. I fear if these envious emotions are not being curbed , they would resolve into a certain form of retaliation.

The question is, is there any way to make these people more civilized, to transform their way of thinking, to change their laid-back attitude and to empower themselves? This is so crucial as I believe these people are the bulk of the Malay nation. We shouldn't be ashamed to admit that these people exist amongst us. We shouldn't chose to ignore this problem, sweeping it under the carpet. Our 'great' politicians should buck up and do something more concrete and stop lip-servicing. They shouldn't 'make use' or abuse these people just for the sake of winning elections. These people are not just numbers and statistics to make a certain political party win elections (once, you've won the election, you simply ignore these people's presence). These are humans which make or break a society and more importantly, a country. Neglecting their livelihood, especially in giving good, relevant and practical education to their young generation will definitely lead to a downfall of our malay nation. And one glaring mistake and injustice done to these kampung folks is implementing Maths and Science education in English. If they have grave problem understanding Science and Maths in Malay, can the education minister explain how can they understand them at all, in English?? Do you know that many of the rural teachers have resorted into translating word by word to make these poor kids understand? How time consuming and surely, surely exhausting! Our Malay society is bogged down with these two serious issues and we need to address them urgently, namely, drug addiction and a deteriorating education system. *sorry for this digression*

So here I am, stuck, with a sense of non-belonging. Living a 'global' life (or should I use 'glocal'? But honestly I still haven't worked out its true meaning and what the DPM really meant by it) in a kampung that I find hard to blend in.....

My World In A Handbag

I was spring-cleaning my hand-bag just now and boy, the things that I keep in it! Wanna know what they are? My pink purse given by iFos (and this contains endless odds and ends as well!), a copy of al Mathurat, a small book of Asma ul husna, a copy of Juzz Amma, a copy of Surah2 amalan, my reading glasses (yes I need them to see near ~shows I'm that old!), all kinds of pretty pens given by drug-reps, my handset, medicated creams, an embroidered sachet filled with 2 lipsticks which I seldom wear, plaster-bands (songlap dari klinik, hehe), zipper-bag filled with panadols, maxalon (for fever, headache and travelling sickness), bits of papers with my clinic schedules written on them, my bank book.....

Off and on, this bag of mine also carries CDs, socks, tasbih ....if I could, I would stuff in my telekung as well but then I fear what the 'RSPCH' would do to me...what's RSPCH you ask? It's the Royal Society of Prevention of Cruelty to Handbags!

Quoting a male partner I had during varsity days who were always next to me in my lab classes, who would rummage through my huge pencil case for things he needed, "waahh, you have everything in here...only minus the kitchen sink!!" Zainal Azim (that's his name) if you are reading this, eat your heart out!! ( the odds that he would is as slim as having George Bush reading this blog!!)

Now, wait till I tell you what I keep and carry in my Tote, everyday, to work! I carry tonnes of books just in case I need to read them! Hehe....iKelah would nag me relentlessly regarding this bag as he finds it a sore-eye whenever he uses the car...sorry!

So to my female bloggers, what do you keep in your handbags?? Anything good?

Wednesday, November 09, 2005


I don't know how to describe how today has been for me. Has it been bad? Has it been good? I don't know. The good thing is I fasted today, alhamdulillah. But what disturbed me are the things that occured within a short span of time, infact it was within 3 hrs! These things may be classed as small tragedies, depending on how you view them in their own perspectives.

I started working in the morning in the main clinic which means loads and loads of patients, alone! (usually it takes 2 doctors to cover the load but since some are still on raya leave, I have to bear the brunt alone!). Anyway after few antenatals, some ultrasounds, an Incision and Drainage (of left axilla- ouch, damn painful despite tonnes of Ethyl Chloride spray!) and endless URTIs, I managed to end the morning 5 minutes late! Rushed home for a short afternoon break and mingle with ikelah who happened to also spend his short break at home.

2pm, rushed back to the same clinic and began another marathon. 3pm, whilst engaging in doctor-patient consultation, the assistant interupted, "ada emergency doctor". I rushed next door. Saw a man bending over his already ashen-faced wife on the trolley. She was already gasping and breathing erratically, almost unconscious. One glance and I knew, death is at her door. But I need to resuscitate anyway.

Checked her pulse, can't feel. Pupils fixed and almost dilated. BP is unrecordable. Gasping. Opened her mouth, saw a white pill on her tongue, must be sublingual GTN. Reminded the husband to teach her the syahadah. Masked and bagged and proceeded with CPR. Tried to set IV line but all her veins were small and wirey and already collapsed. Gave her I/V adrenaline 1 ampoule but still the same.

Finally, 3.30pm, failed resuscation and pronounced her dead. Comforted the husband. I know I shouldn't have let him in the room during the resus but this clinic has been so patient-friendly that their kids can sit on my chair and tap the keyboard if they wanted to!

I was so drained out after that, I can't even manage to whole mind was covered with intense sorrow....

Finished at 5pm and rushed home. Promised mak (who is here) to go to Mak Teh's for tea. At 6pm, we started out. Barely 100 meters away, the accident occured. I was on the left side minding my own way. There were 5-6 motorcyclists hogging , idling, on the right side, none with helmets. Suddenly one of them who were facing the wrong way, swerved his bike to the left. right into my car! Bham!! His bike half went under and got stuck underneath. He managed to get up and limped a bit. I dare not go out fearing the damage he has done to my car. His pal asked me to reverse to let go off the bike. Stupidly, I followed. In the midst of confusion, the culprit got away, leaving us aghast. We tried to call them back but in vain. Worst still, we didn't get his plate number.

The question is, should I make a police report? I called the traffic seargent and he said since I don't have the plate number, the only insurance I can claim is my own! Which is not worth the trouble. Even then, if I had his number, I doubt that his bike is insured at all! So either way I lose!

The damage? My front number-plate is broken into pieces. The right-side lamp is broken. The front bumper has a hole on the right side . Estimation? I don't know. (maybe I should take pics of the damages and post it here, eh?)

So how would you describe my day?

I can't write long for this entry. My car was just being hit by a bike ridden by one of the many reckless kampung boys here.. I didn't manage to get his registration number and he sped away guiltlessly.Feel so down. Ironically I just commented on Nurelhuda's site regarding acceptance and redha. So this is Allah's test for me. Salams everyone!

Saturday, November 05, 2005


We reached the hotel lobby 10 minutes before 3pm. Called his secretary and waited patiently albeit nervous like a rat. Why should I be nervous. you asked? Subhanallah, I was going to meet a person who had ranked himself amongst the great names. I could be meeting a great malay politician or a popular singer or TV personality who has so much time in his hand to blog and be amicable with adolecsent bloggers including my own daughter! What if he was a royalty, I toyed with the idea? Gosh, what should I address him as?

Then, I saw his 'secretary'. He was supposed to wear green baju melayu, sampin and songkok. But this very young guy, in fact, a boy, was wearing something bluish, no sampin and no songkok. 'Betul ke ni? Nekad je la' I approached him and when near, he looked so much like Hiyoshi. 'Hiyoshi?', I asked. 'No' he replied crisply. So, we followed him. Along the way, I tried my best to extricate whatever info I can from this rather cool and overly-composed guy.

'Who is he really?, I asked. 'Is he really a famous personality as claimed?' 'No, I was strictly told not to reveal anything and save it for the last minute' he replied nonchalantly, straight face. 'Who else has arrived?' 'No one else'. Ok, this is one tough fellow. He won't budge.

We took the lift and walked to the next wing and took another lift. Really felt like in the 'Get Smart' series. And finally we reached THE room!

Ta Da!! The door opened and there HE was with his beautiful beloved! Our very own Pycnogenol! Aghast, I stepped into the room dazed! It was so surreal! Finally I come face to face with this person who had encouraged me to blog, who continued to keep us guessing who he really is and who is forever leaving sweet and positive comments wherever he goes.

We were the first to arrive. So we had sometime warming up (despite the air-con we were probably flustered up primarily due to excitement and some degree of embarrassment). We managed to do some reminiscing about our entries and placing things into certain perspectives, now that we have got to know everyone in person.

Next, came Nurelhuda with 3 of her children. We hugged like we've known for years! I didn't get to ask her but I bet she felt like it was a dream too cause she sure looked confused! Incidentally, I met my mom's neighbour earlier on who on probing turned out to be Nurelhuda's cousin! What a small, small world! (unlike Mawi's of course!)

Hiyoshi being Hiyoshi had tried to pull a grandiose entrance but unfortunately his entrance went slightly unnoticed :) heheh. Sorry! This rather contradicts your version eh? Anyway one is entitled to their own version isn't it?!

Inositol came last, alone. She remains her enigmatic self :). We too hugged like we've known each other ages. She does have some semblance to Ida Nerina, her wide eyes especially, :). Minah kilang or not, she is someone I can reckon with anytime!

Surprisingly we had no problem finding topics to discuss. Pycnogenol as expected turned out to be a magnificent host. Nurelhuda is as Hiyoshi has described: as deep as her entries! :)) but I could understand her better in person unlike her entries which I might take many re-reads to fully understand!

Actually Hiyoshi came with his parents and siblings. He sat next to me and we managed to make small talk. I found him a shy person who had to be provoked to finally open up. And seriously, his writings are more 'extrovert' than what he really is! :)) After that short meet, I gathered that he was doing quite well in his studies and insyallah you'll make a good doctor, Hiyoshi!

'Ok, ok, skip the details', I can hear you guys grumbling. 'We already know what you ate'. Hiyoshi has made a good job in describing the food served (It's as though he had prepared the food himself! ). 'Please stop the suspense!' 'So who is this PYCNOGENOL please!' Oklah guys I know how it feels to be stuck in an abysmal passage of guessing game. Why it nearly left me bald from scratching my non-itchy head ! So you really want to know who this mysterious fella is? Click the comment page!

Tuesday, November 01, 2005


















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