Thursday, December 22, 2005


What's with women drivers??
It was rather late at night. Was driving back from work. Feeling all tired and weary. Just wanting to hit the sack. It's a straight road, parallel with the beach. I was flooring the gas with a reasonable, legal speed, minding my own way. Suddenly there was this Kembara, coming out from a small road and entering the main road I was on, slowly. I saw it from the corner of my eye. Well, I thought, 'you'd better keep to the side of the road, or else!' But I was wrong! The Kembara chose to come in straight into the middle of the main road, right smack in front of me! My brain, it's peripheral impulses and reflexes acted all at once! Half of my mind wanted to just overtake it and squeeze in between it and an oncoming car. The other half got control and my right foot slammed on the brakes to the fullest! SCREEEEECH!

Oh no! Don't let that speeding Kancil (a speeding Kancil spells disaster!) behind which was following so close , lose control! In my mind, (I was talking to myself at that instant) 'I'm going to hit this Kembara. Definitely 'kena hentam' this time'. And I was already picturing my car being hit, the badly distorted dented bonnet with broken headlights, in that split instant. Notice how our brain can do complex thinking in the spur of a heightened moment. No hope, I thought! At the same time, I managed to work on my angst and was blaring the horn continuously and irritatingly , it felt like eternity! Alhamdulillah, the Kancil at the back acted fast, swerved to its left and overtook me and the @#$%^%$# Kembara in one go. And I? I was so nerve-wrecked and pissed off, I just couldn't overtake the @#$^%$ Kembara anymore and just followed behind till I reached my turning. It was a lady-driver. Should I be surprised? What's worst was, she looked unperturbed by the whole incident! Driving ahead like she's done no one wrong. She didn't even make an effort to speed up after hearing my blaring horn. These sort of drivers shouldn't be allowed on the road and their license be revoked. They are the types who drive leisurely, almost dreamy sort of way, entering into main roads without bothering to stop at junctions. So was I sinful for cursing her all the way till I reach home??? You tell me! But of course, you'll tell me, the most important thing is that I am safe and no accident really occured, alhamdulillah. But still, I tell you..blah.blah..blah...

Nicotine-induced clouded minds.
At the clinic.The name on the PC screen belongs to a male patient. Pressed for his number. In came a man, his wife and a child. Told him to sit on the patient's chair. He refused. He took the chair in front and directed the wife, instead to sit next to me. So who's the patient I asked? Blank face. No answer. I asked again. The wife spoke. 'Actually we came because he wants to stop smoking and wants advice plus treatment.' she said. 'Oh ok' I said. After asking for important points like how many sticks per day and duration, he said 'it's actually for the both of us'. What? I looked at the wife. Studied her face. 'Wah, this lady also smoke one?' Didn't know that kampung ladies wearing tudung also smoke nowadays! Have I been so detached from the real-world (read: too attached to the blog-world eh?) to not notice this trend? Looked at the man, then looked at the wife. I was bewildered, needles to say. The man was still wearing that blank, uneasy face. So the wife offered to ease my mental anguish (was probably obvious). "It's my son who needs this treatment badly. He's 16. He wants out but doesn't want to come himself". Aiyah! Should have told me from the beginning and safe me from this agony!! The man must have thought that I'd pick up the phone and dial for the police or what??Argghhh! Patients!

Lengthy Phone Chats Are Not For Me
If you want to talk to me on the phone, please make it sweet and short. I hate long phone conversations. They're not for me. This time-consuming thingy usually leave me numb in my arms for holding the receiver for too long, ear-lobes warm and red with temporary partial hearing loss in the overly used ear. These are calls made by certain people, so I have to oblige and make myself sound enthusiastic eventhough I might have some other pressing matters to attend to or my already tired brain almost entering slumber zone. Once, this friend called. When a person calls, we can't end the conversation thus I had to wait for her to say her goodbyes, lest I'd be considered rude, isn't it? She kept on talking and I kept on being enthusiastic and interested, eventhough my mind is half-asleep! It went on till she mentioned something interesting and I got perked up and started asking questions. Then suddenly she cut me off, saying, "oh my hubby asks me to stop as I might get my asthmatic attack again!" Sheesh! It's not the first time I got that from her. Once before, she called me (I never initiate the calls!) and yakked , yakked till one point she said she had to stop cause the hubby has just arrived home from work. Masyallah! So what does she think? How about my hubby whom I have been neglecting for an hour or so because I have to entertain her on the phone? What signal is she sending? So its ok for me to ignore my hubby but it's not for her??

What New Year Resolution?
I am never a person who'd list things to do for each coming year. Never a person with hard, solid, yearly resolutions! That's what I am. I prefer to keep things simple and easy. I live by the day. I'll plan and do things when the need arises. No hard and rigid rules. I am a very flexible person. So no new year resolution again this year. I just pray to Allah swt that the coming year will be better for all of us, more khusyuk in our ibadah, stronger in our conviction for Islam and of course constant blessings from Him! Ameen! Take care, eyeryone!

Saturday, December 17, 2005


Never dwell on a dream we had the previous night, I was told. For lay-men like us with 'a not so high makam', dreams are only visions in our sleep provoked by the day's events, entwined with the satan's evil-doings. But I had a very strange dream last night. In fact it was rather interesting as I have never had such an almost logical one before. Most of the time, my dreams are absurd, incomprehensible sequences of events, one after another, that even if I piece them together when I am conscious, they don't make tangible sense!

Ok, now let me recall what exactly did I dream last night. Oh gosh, I think I have lost some of the fragmented visions already! That's another problem I face nowadays with my dreams. I seemed not able to recall most of it and the next day I am being left with just a diluted, fuzzy and convoluted story-line! Well, in a nut-shell, in this particular dream, I was driving alone to a certain destination, rather far. What? Travel alone? Never in my life! Half-through the dream or the destination, (whatever!), I suddenly found myself in another place, out of my destination. Well, that's not weird when you're in a dream, you say. But it's suppposed to be, in this dream. Apparently, whislt driving, I ?met with an accident (not sure, but I just made this conclusion in the dream) and had amnesia (yes folks, I had amnesia in my dream!).

After the accident, I had allegedly, staggered on foot and went out of destination, hundreds of kilometers away (I think so, but distant and time are so irrelevant in a dream, anyway!). When I regained my memory back I became frantic! Started making calls and finally was rescued from the ordeal and was brought back home. In between the confusing dream, there were interesting scenes which I can't vividly recall but my good neurons tell me there were. Now don't go and make your own dream interpretations for me, ok? I don't believe in them unless you are Prophet Yusof, :)

Before I got married, I had frequent dreams of being chased by snakes. Yucks! The fact that I loathe them, made it worse! There were small ones and there were also big python-like ones. Well, we all know what the Malay interpretations of these dreams are. I don't believe much in it either, but funnily, after getting married, these dreams stopped altogether! Coincidence?

I used to have these recurrent dreams of climbing a tall but narrow building almost like a tower and as I ascend, the structure starts to taper at the base rendering it unstable. Never really knew the significance of those dreams. And what about dreams of being chased by demons and evil people etc? No matter how exasperating the chase would be, those hounders never succeed to catch me even though the chasing felt like a slow-motion scene! And in those dreams too, I would transform into a slick fugitive who is so good in hiding and evading chasing rouges.

I am sure everyone has had dreams where the characters in the dream would conveniently interchange from one to another just to suit the occasion. If only we can make that happen in real life! That'll be something! Like when we have the unfortunate luck of getting a notoriously known lecturer who has the divine notion that he/she was put in this world on the sole purpose to fail their students! Or going for blind dates and ending up with someone so distasteful. Then like in a dream, we could conveniently switch them with others!

There were times too (though not frequent) when I get dreams that would strongly evoke my inner emotions and the surreal feelings would continue to linger on when I am consicous. These are the sort of dreams that might make an impact on your daily activities. So if someone who comes to work looking all perky and bright or all gloomy and quiet, then perhaps the night before, an emotional dream they have acquired.

Is it true that sometimes, if you dreamt of someone , that someone would also have dreamt about you simultaneously the same night? However it would be too embarassing to find out if this theory is true as usually the dream is so ridiculous to begin with!

The worst dream, they say, is to dream of someone who is already dead. The Malays say that if in your dream, the dead talks to you and you talk back or you chose to follow them, then it means that ...(alamat tak lama lagi la tu!).....or if you dreamt of a broken tooth or needle, it means someone is dying....what gross superstitions! These dreams would usually make you worry unnecessarily for days on end!

Some people would attempt to continue the same (good ones that is!) dream after having being rudely awaken. Apparently some do succeed! And some people even claimed to have a dream within a dream . Can this be true? But the best part about dreams especially bad ones, is the ability to wake up and finding you are safe and sound after all! Phew! Nothing beats the sheer relief of finding yourself snug and safe in your bed after having pumped maximum adrenaline trying to escape a ghastly ghost!

Do we dream in black and white or in color? Nobody can say for sure. Are dreams important? Do they have any significance in our psychological realm? Has anyone claimed that they've never dreamt throughout their whole life? (like my FIL who claims that he had never before in his entire life experience headache and never knew how it felt to have a splitting headache! Lucky you, FIL!)

Do you have good dream-stories to share with us?

The best way to avoid weird, mind-boggling dreams, is to recite:
1) Al-fatehah once
2) Ayat Qursi once

3) Al Kafirun
4)Al-ikhlas once
5) Al-falaq once
6) An-nas once

7) Subhanallah 33 x
8) Alhamdulillah 33 x
9) Allahu-akbar 33 x
imediately before we hit slumber-land, insyallah.....sweet dreams everyone!

p.s. This is to inform everyone that Boogey is going for Hajj on the 30th. He is going to handle 150 jemaah altogether insyallah. May Allah swt makes it easy for you overthere and that everything will run smoothly as planned. Also, may none of your jemaah give you headache, :))

Tuesday, December 13, 2005


I am borrowing Anedra's topic of a recent entry: ADA APA PADA LELAKI BOTAK? Since I have no affinity towards these apparently sexy testosterone-laden beings , I have chosen cats instead, as I perceive that many people can't fathom why some people like me adore these feline creatures so much. Just like Anedra, who goes ga-ga over bald men, my heart just melts each time I see a cat, whatever its pedigree, colour or size. I can't really explain but a cat's presence just lures my attention, be it just for a few seconds. It's as though I have a connection with them and the feeling of empathy for them is so great!

My love for cats began since I was young. I'd feed stray cats at the back of my house, giving them whatever left-overs we had from lunch or dinner. Mak would nag me off, fearing the cats would make our house their permanent abode. Not wanting to defy mak, I didn't pursue this 'love' intensely, only doing my good samaritan act when mak was not around to grumble her dislike.

My interest in cats rekindled back after I got married as my late MIL was also an avid cat lover and had at one time took care about 7-8 cats of long-haired species. One of them was a family legend named Kitty, which had many percularities in traits and behavior. But of course, Boogey and iKelah are the better experts on Kitty's colorful past thus I shall not dwell on her further.

For many years when iFos and Aliah were small, they would pester us to adopt cats (Sarah initially had qualms being around cats but look at her now!) However due to many reasons of health and sanitation, we adamantly refused. Till one day, when a stray cat came and we hadn't the heart to turn her away. She came as a kitten and lived with us till she produced 2 litters of kittens. One day she simply disappeared and never came back. We were not that cat-savvy then and we didn't make an effort to give her a name. We just called her 'Mak Kucing' as she was the mother to all the kittens. All her kittens didn't survive except one which grew into a big chubby one. We called him/her 'Debab' .We weren't sure of her/his sex as she/he showed contradicting characteristics. It had genitalia of a male but we were shocked when it breastfed its own siblings when 'Mak Kucing' disappeared! Blimey!

Mayo and Pooty frolicking

Later, after Debab died of mysterious circumstances, we were cat-free for quite sometime till iKelah saw a cute and playful orangey semi-persian kitten for sale in a pet-shop (actually it was a kedai jual ikan-aquarium). That marked the day 'Mayo' came into our lives. From a very playful, cheeky lovable long-haired kitten, Mayo grew into a beautiful orangey semi-persian with a not-so-peeky face. In fact, Mayo does resemble Garfield in several aspects, her indifference especially :). When she was at her peak, she had a beautiful 'mane' around her neck, which according to the vet is a trait belonging to the Maine-coons (another cat species). So we concluded that Mayo is actually a cross-breed of Persian and Maine-coon. Being Persian, explains her indifference. She never establish eye-contact with us, no matter how hard we tried. She always put on a face that says " don't mind me".

Being half Maine-coon means that she also inherits some of its traits. One of it is being a dare-devil with careless attitude, fearless of heights and sitting on precarious spots. She loves climbing out of the bedroom window (risking fall) and laze on the air-con compressor, watching with great interest at the birds flying above but with no urge whatsoever to attack them!

Later we bought Pooty, an all-white Turkish Angora. Whilst Mayo displays an extremely indifference attitude, Pooty is a very loving cat that exudes warmth and friendliness. It is a true lap-cat. It loved being cradled on our laps and would purr with sheer contentment. Pooty would look into our eyes knowingly and I could swear that he could read our minds. At our old house, due to space constraint and fear of them getting astrayed, we caged them up, only setting them free into the house at intervals. Stray cats would come to woo Mayo and poor Pooty would observe with great distaste (literally!). He would 'jeling' and turn his face just to show his detest. Once my maid shoo-ed a wooing stray and Pooty let out an almost sniggering giggle! Fancy that!

Pooty is such a clumsy lad and would always dirty his pure white coat, leaving stubborn black stains, making it impossible for us to clean even with vigorous scrubbing. Mayo is the complete opposite and would lick herself clean all over with repetitive nodding movements (its amazing that she's never tired of doing this). So one day, on the vet's advice, we had him clean-shaved leaving just a small tuft at the end of his tail (just to let him know that it's his tail and not to bite it!) Anedra would have drooled looking at this bald sphinx-like cat! Sadly it was only few weeks later that he disappeared never to come back.

One night, a stormy one, unknown to us, Pooty left the house for good. We searched for him all over the village, on foot and by car. We left notices with pictures of him all over. But to no avail. According to the people here, in this village, no long-haired cats should be let loose lest it'll be nabbed. Now it has been 7 months since he was probably stolen and we still miss him sorely. Our hearts wrench each time his image comes to mind and questions like: are you eating well Pooty? Have your coat grown back as beautiful as before? Are you still alive? would play in our minds. We will forever miss you Pooty!

My children have inherited my empathy for cats and have, in fact, outdone me! iFos and Aliah would cry each time our cats die. They would show their dislike if someone mistreats any cats. Once we stopped at an R & R for prayers. After exiting the toilet I saw Aliah, red in the face with tears, at the surau entrance. Apparently a cat was splashed with cold water for wanting to enter the surau as it smelled food from within. Aliah was furiously guarding the cat, delaying her prayers, preventing it from entering again lest it'll get a second dose of shower!

Mayo has given birth twice and now she's pregnant again. And one of her offspring has also given birth to 4 kittens. I have lost track on their numbers! My plan: to make Mayo pregnant one last time with Nikko (another Maine-coon, a male stud, belonging to the vet) and then tie her tubes! At least insyallah this time, she'll give birth to long-haired offsprings like her, unlike those before, as she had gone for illegal mating all this while! Since the kucing kampung here, almost all, have kinked tails, so her offsprings' tails so far are not beautiful as hers! (kontot and patah!)

So that is the story of my feline friends who are almost human and very dear to my heart. Ada apa pada kucing? Lots, I daresay! Miaow!

Friday, December 09, 2005


We have a guest since last Tuesday, Muhammad's friend, a senior. Both of them had spent three days with an ENT specialist, tagging at her clinic and OT. So today, to honour our guest, I have decided to cook dinner and chose Spaghetti Bolognaise, which is also Muhammad's all-time favorite.

What I am about to show may be detrimental to all the Italian Chefs around as I have improvised the recipe quite a bit, adapting it according to the whims of my taste-buds! So to those who are staunch traditional recipes 'sticklers' , you should exit here! :p

Ingredients prepared: grated carrot, finely diced celery, chopped onions, chopped garlic, minced meat, home-made chilli boh (the detrimental ingredient, hehe), tomato puree 1 can and sauce, chillie sauce, bay -leaves, oregano, chopped parsley

Method: Sautee the onions and garlic in canola/olive oil till brown. Fry in the chillie boh. This adds spice and gives better Asian flavor to the sauce, rather than having just a plain and bland tomato tasting gravy. Add in tomato puree and wait till it gurgles. Then pour in your minced meat which looked kinda weired in the picture. Stir and blend the meat into the tomato mixture till you're sure that the meat has absorbed all the flavors and are well-cooked. Add in the chopped celery and grated carrot. Besides giving flavor, these ingredients lend the crunchiness to the gravy. Sprinkle in the oregano but not too much as its distinctiveness will outdo the Asian tang we desire here. Place in the bay leaves, another herb so much proclaimed by the Italians.

To satisfy my seasoned taste-buds, I'd add in chillie and tomato sauce in amounts that vary according to time, place , weather and also hormonal challenges! A tip I learned from Chef Wan: when cooking a sour dish, add in sugar in liberal amounts to neutralize the acidity. I may be biased towards this coz I am a sucker to sweetness, having been accustomed to sweet-savory food since small.

When buying spaghetti, I'd look for the thinnest possible so it will turn out just nice and ala dante. Empty the packet of spaghetti into a deep pot of boiling water. Once cooked, drop a blob of margerine. Drain.

Serve spaghetti with a generous serving of the gravy garnished with parsley and parmesan cheese. Bon appetit!

Monday, December 05, 2005

My 'Not So Happening' Weekend ......

........As Compared To Nurelhuda's

Went to Lembah Beringin last Saturday to fetch my son, Muhammad (wrote about him here) at KYUEM college, who has just started his 6 weeks hols. It was Parents' Day and we had quite a time meeting his teachers. To begin with, it was unlike the normal Parents' day we usually attended before . This is a college where almost a third of its educators are British including the headmaster himself, Mr Richard Small. Thus, many of the college's rules and regulations, style and emphasis are so English in nature but perhaps entwined with bits of Malaysian hues, here and there.

To start with, the report book was very impressive, the layout, that is. The results, I'll deal with later, :). Each particular subject was given a full page, where the subject teacher would give their sincere remarks with regards to the student's performance throughout the semester, their attitude and enthusiasm. All the teachers were stationed in the hall behind their desks with their names exhibited to ease the parents finding them.

Firstly , we saw his Maths teacher, a young Malay lady, whom I immediately, took a liking to. She was frank and seemed sincere to help Muhammad gain good results in his coming exams. She spoke with a graceful lilt and there was a slight hint of British accent too.

Next, we met his Chemistry teacher who is probably a Pakistani Brit (forgot to ask Muhammad). A youngish gentleman who was so polite and very pleasing in demeanor. He gave positive remarks and apparently believed that Muhammad has no problem to prove his best in the coming exams, insyallah.

His Biology teacher is helluva guy! A down-to-earth Malay man who stressed on being transparent. Since Muhammad did well in Biology, this teacher focused more on Muhammad's attitude and it's negativity. He was concerned on a certain aspect and we dealt with it seriously in front of Muhammad! And for that, I thanked him.

Lastly we sat with the English teacher who suggested that he started writing daily, making his own journal, to improve his writing. We had encouraged him to start his own blog but apparently this teacher is against it. She said that most of these blogs were written in a 'merapu' sort of manner and prefered that he sticks to the conventional method. To me, it doesn't matter what mode he choses to write. As long as he writes proper English, the outcome would be the same, insyallah.

The college is always generous in providing food for its visitors. We were served buffet-styled. No. There were no macaroons, bagles, or buns . None of those English treats. We had the usual Malaysian spread of Mee Hoon, rendang ayam, kuih lapis and biscuits. The HM and some of the teachers were seen mingling amongst parents, making small talks. Some of the British teachers were bulging in the waists, I see. Hope they don't blame it on the local food! Another Biology teacher ( A Dutch, I was told) had donned dark-shades throughout. Apparently his trademark. (only to be scorned by his students: macam orang buta je!) But he looked so much like Keannu Reeves in the Matrix to me, :).

One more thing that I need to mention is the hostel. The hostel here is quite unique. The students live in chalets which consist of 4 small rooms , a small common room and an attached bath. And guess what? All these chalets are air-conned in the common room! These are difinitely luxury to me!

After spending overnight at my parents' in Ampang (had a nice time chatting with mak), we headed for the PC Fair the next morning. I decided not to bore myself and instead ambled along with mak and bapak at KLCC, :). Since it was the last day of the fair, it was a mad rush and 'shoving' was the act of the day! And apparently the price of everything was sinfully cheap, leaving ikelah drooling badly! My sister, TK, got herself a branded wireless optic mouse for her laptop which according to iKelah was a steal, at RM 130. My dad was flabbergasted when he found out the price. "Mouse apa nih sampai 130 ringgit? Bapak boleh dapat seringgit jek!" Ye lah, bapak! heheh

At the PC Fair. Some booths were displayed ala McD! Fancy!

So that was my weekend. Btw, since my last entry on food drew quite a number of comments, I have decided to make food-entries a norm. But time and energy is so precious to me nowadays, thus I can't promise much...but Has' kitchen is so beautiful that I am tempted to just make my next cooking-entry straight from her kitchen! Big, fat hope huh?

p.s. Nurelhuda was away for a week but look what agendas she has occupied herself with! Masyallah! Queen of the House is going crockery shopping this December.Hiyoshi has a new entry on his debate thingy. Pang5 just came back from a Singapore trip. Kenakelayan extended her holidays and is now back in Dungun. iFos has decided to tell everyone that she's alive by reproducing 'this' entry. Bergen is off somewhere after sending off his Aunt Su. Crimsonskye and Ayumi has made a sub-fellow-blogger meet without us! boo hoo! Halela is getting ready for Hajj. Finally, iKelah has a fairly recent entry on snatch-thief and its severe repercussions.

Till later, take care, wassalam!

Monday, November 28, 2005

Scrumptious Kuih Cara

I love going to blogs that depict pictorial steps of making a dish. Some have managed to make the whole process of cooking a rather elaborate dish look so easy and 'do-able' for people like me who prefer simple and fast cooking like stir-frying!

Below is a pictorial recipe of 'Kuih Cara Manis' which is best taken hot and downed with a cup of hot tea on a balmy evening on the verandah, with the sea-breeze puffing gently in the air.

Kuih Cara is a Malay delicacy that uses a flour mixture and is cooked in a patterned iron or brass mould that can make 8 in a go. This kuih comes in 2 varieties, you can make it plain sweet, just by dropping some sugar in the center or savoury, by adding a mixture of spiced minced meat mixture.

Here is an authentic recipe of Kuih Cara Manis. You can be sure of getting good results if followed correctly unlike some recipes you get in some Malay magazines. Yes, I have been duped many a time by those half-hearted recipes ! I believe we Malays have this bad habit of not wanting to part with our knowledge especially old traditional recipes. Thus, when they give out those recipes, they would purposely miss out one or two ingredients or one or two vital steps in the methods! Sheesh!


125 gm plain flour (cap wau can do)
250 ml santan (buy the commercially prepared ones, easy)
1 egg
a tinge of green color
a dash of salt
sugar to sprinkle in the centre (about 1/4 tsp for each kuih)


1. Mix all the ingredients together, manually. You don't need a mixer for this. If the mixture is not smooth, kindly strain.
2. Meanwhile heat up the mould on the stove. Slather it with some cooking oil to prevent sticking

3. Place a ladle-ful of the mixture to almost fill each mould

4- Sprinkle about 1/4 tsp of sugar in the center of each mixture

5. Cover and cook about 5 mins or till it browns.

p.s. Such coincidence!!Has has entred a similar entry on Lepat Pisang Acheh. Her entry is better as it is made from her own grown pisang and kelapa. And her kitchen is comparable to Martha Stewart's!! Mine is so mediocre!!!

Sunday, November 27, 2005

The Thai Connection

iKelah and I were having fun bantering at Pycnogenol's blog, writing in the language we managed to pick up albeit just a little, during our first year in varsity.No we were'nt in the same class as he was a year senior. I badly wanted to take Arabic as my elective subject then but I was amongst the last to cue (I hate to wait in line!). As the Arabic class was already full, I was only left with the Thai class. Having no choice, I registered. iKelah too faced the same predicaments but he opted for English Translation in one semester and Thai in another. So I can boast that my Thai is much, much better than his! Ehehe.

Thai is a fairly easy language to pick up, a bit like Malay where the words are spelled according to the sound. We had Khun Serm Suk as our teacher, a motherly lady. So for every lesson both semesters, we drilled on the basics of the language, talking like pre-school children. 'Khun jak pai nai kha?' where are you going to?'Chan jak pai rong rem' I am going to the cinema. The Thais must love going to the movies as this was one of the many oft-repeated sentences we learn everyday!

And one of the percularities of Thai language is the soft melodious intonation that accompanies it. Kun Serm Suk would time and again stressed that we had to learn that aspect too or else our Thai would only be half-baked, so to speak!

Ours was a small class, about 15 I think. The boys were always the cheeky and adventurous ones, making daring statements like 'I am going to the cinema with my girlfriend tonight'or "I love my girlfriend so much as she's pretty' in what little Thai vocabulary they possess.They were never shy to try making sentences whenever they acquire new words.They always turn out sounding so funny and most of the time we were laughing our heads off making Khun Serm Suk all the more exasperated! And most of the time, these boys would put on a straight, serious face ! They are such clowns, I tell you! We girls prefer safe , mundane statements like 'I am going to the library now', 'How many brothers and sisters have you?''I love eating rice with Tom Yam' or "what day is today?" Yes, we girls always play it safe.

iKelah related to me on how he would use his standard answers whenever Serm Suk asked him to make sentences. It goes like this : 'Kun sebai di krab? Pom sebai . Kun phut pha sa thai krab? Pom phut pa sa thai mai keng. Pom put pha sa thai nit noy." Translation: How are you? I am fine. Do you speak Thai? I dont speak good Thai. I speak a bit of Thai." Another standard answer of his when he was lost for words would be 'Pom mai kao jai, pom phut pha sa thai nit noy'. Translation: I don't understand, I speak little Thai'.

So Pycno and Bea are going to Bangkok this December. Since they don't know Thai 'sepatah haram', I , drroza, am being kind enough *coughs* to offer my service as intepreter for them *coughs*. As the song goes, "all my bags are packed, I'm ready to go..."

Speaking of Bangkok, iFos went there alone (was it 2 yrs ago, Fi?) and met up with my sis,OG. OG requested that iFos help babysit her youngest daughter whilst she accompanied the eldest for a swimming meet. As they had travelled from Beijing, iFos had to travel alone from here. That was iFos', first major travel alone. Alhamdulillah, all went fine.

I take this opportunity to wish Pycno and Bea, a happy trip with their whole jingbang except for.........(can't say who!!). To you-know-who, I hope you are not feeling dejected for being left behind! *chortle*

Below is iKelah's Thai class picture taken then. ( iKelah is known to be a person who takes photos and keeps them for old time sake and I am not, so that's why I have no pics to share!) Many in the picture have become renowned figures. One of them is the President Of Mercy. One is a plastic surgeon (HOD Surgical Dpt USM). One is successful diversified businessmen. One is manager of Medic Online.One is HOD of O&G UPM. One is Consultant Paediatrician. And one is a professional Blogger. heheheh. And the list goes on....

Thursday, November 24, 2005

A Good Husband, He Is Not!

Occasionally I enjoy sitting down with my Sumateran maid and listen to her gossip about her family back home. She's from Padang and I would say not from a poor family. She doesn't have to work if she wants to. That explains why my maid can be a bit high and mighty at times, acting like she's the boss. She came here many years ago to visit her sister who is married to a local in Dengkil, Bangi. I am not sure what exactly transpired but she later decided to work. As she has no formal education, becoming a house-helper was the best option. After working in several households, she landed in mine when Aliah, my 14 year old daughter was 4 mths old. That explains why Aliah is so attached to her and she to Aliah. Their relationship I shall not delve now as it summons a complete whole entry.

So it was during lunch few days ago that my maid told me the sad story of her niece in Dengkil, who got married more than a year ago, to the same guy whom she got engaged, broke off and reconciliated. He was a low-ranked army personel. She, holding a diploma, works initially at KLIA as ticketting clerk, later switching jobs from a firm to another. Thus, she managed to save some money to get herself a car and what nots. Their marriage was done in a rush and never approved by her mother (my maid's sister). After some misunderstanding (between the niece's husband and my maid's sister), they left the house and lived at her grandma's nearby.

Gradually, the husband showed his true colour. He now, controls her car, sending her to work and at other times asking her to take the bus whilst he uses her car full time, guiltlessly! They lodge at her grandma's without paying any pittance, not even for provisions. Since, the grandma has old issues with the girl's mother, the guy takes the opportunity to vilify his mother in law even more! He even forbids her from visiting her parents and if she defies, he'll give her hell of a time. On the times that she is back home at her mother's she'd gorge her food down as though she hasn't had any meals for months. She would also requests her youger sister (who has done well in studies and just started work as an engineer) to buy her favorite fast food (McDs and such) which she used to enjoy prior marriage. This really breaks her mother's heart! And now, unfortunately (as I see it) she is a few months pregnant! During raya she secretly went back to her mom's only to get some severe tongue lashing from him! Masyallah! Worst still, the latest I heard, she has pawned all her jewelleries, on his insistence.

It's truly mind-boggling to think that a man can shamelessly behave in this unbecoming manner! When a girl marries, she dreams of being protected by the man whom she calls husband. She dreams of a life being provided for. If he is rich, he'll shower her with wealth. If not, he'll do his best to make her comfortable. But when a man marries to only make the wife miserable and having the nerve to even take her belongings from that is blatant wife-abuse!

Even as I sat listening to my maid narrate this sad, sorry, story, I was huffing and puffing, interjecting off and on, "eh, dahsyat nya!", "jahat punya laki!", "tak guna!","mintak cerai je la!". And mind you, my maid is no story-teller. But her facial expressions, her angry tones and palpable angst were enough for me to conclude that this was a marriage not meant-to-be! Suffice to say, after hearing it I was ready to clobber the guy on his head if I had the opportunity to be near him!

Haven't we heard enough of such stories where men abuse their wives mentally? How could these monsters walk around without any guilty conscience whatsoever? Don't they harbor the slighest emotions of pity towards their wives? Are they human in the first place?

Can a wife ask for 'fasaqh' in this sort of condition? I know, some would say that it's going to be difficult because he doesn't physically abuse her. But isn't this misery he had given her enough to grant one?

Being a doctor I am privy to many husband-wife tales which so often can be very repugnant and a bit hard to swallow. I have dealt with wives coming with bruises, hematomas and periorbital eodema, beaten severely by their husbands. Some would divulge with their marital problems, eventhough their initial complain was non-related. Recently I heard of a young wife whose husband wouldn't want to follow her back to her parents' place for her melenggang perut ceremony (she's pregnant with their first child) as it meant he had to spend raya there. So she had to hitch a ride in a friend's car. Imagine!

And for the umpteenth times, we've heard of men neglecting and even abusing their first wives the moment they are hooked with a second! Of course, I am not against polygamy. It's the men who practice it according to their whims and fancies that paint a bad name to it.

Each time I relate to iKelah, the misfortunes of my female patients and friends with regards to their abusive husbands, he would unfailingly point out that these are lessons from Allah swt for me. He would suggest that I 'muhassabah' myself and be grateful that I am being endowed with such a caring and thoughtful husband! (Ok, ok I get your point!)

My heart goes out for all the women who painfully suffer from abusive husbands.......

Monday, November 21, 2005

Of Monsoon, Goats, Pengeras and Fellow-Bloggers

Today we're into the second day of non-stop heavy pouring rain. If it really rained cats and dogs, the humans in Kuantan will have to migrate and let the overflowing canines and felines rule the town! Yesterday, the whole of Sunday, persisted in a gloomy mode, dull and so very wet! The rain poured relentlessly, sometimes hard, loud and thrashing, sometimes soft, monotonous and drizzling, alternatingly. But never the sun shined a single minute, never! At times, the eeirie sounds of monsoon wind hit the rattling window, sounding so much like a human voice trying to scare little kids away. Even the sea-waves wanted a part in this monsoon 'play', culminating into a few feet high and hitting the beach with full vengeance, 'daboooosh!'

The whole house was cold and damp. I needn't switch on the fan at all and wrapped myself with the new Pashmina ikelah bought during his volunteer stint in Mansehra, whole day long. The chill penetrated my bones , brrrr! We went all over the house, like two lost Pashtuns, me and Luqman, :)), tightly wrapped in the shawls. Since the Pashminas were still new, the wool was rather prickly to my sensitive skin and I started scratching as though I have slathered belacan all over me! It even had the 'hamis' smell of 'bakri', still!

In the evening, as the weather got gloomier and darker with no sign of the rain ending its pouring act, I suddenly thought of my fellow-bloggers and how the weather was in their part of the world. So I sent an sms to Pycnogenol, Inositol, Beloved and Nurelhuda, telling them about the rain and all. Only Beloved replied. Apparently she was in an even worse state of gloom as she had her head under a pile of exam scripts that needed meticulous marking to maintain her clear conscience if she failed anyone. To dear Beloved, I ask Allah swt to ease your burden and may you accomplish your mission fast.

*this is the pengeras Kenakelayan gave me to uncover the identity of Pycnogenol~

iKelah had to work till seven yesterday, so we let the hours sail through the cold weather, doing our business (read: eating, reading, putting the room in order, reading the 'pengeras'*, solat, eating again, blogging), patiently waiting for him to come back. Once he reached home, we prayed Maghrib together and set off for dinner outside as promised to celebrate Luqman's UPSR results. No he didn't get 5As. He got only 4 but I am proud of him nevertheless. Alhamdulillah!

On the way back, we decided to stop at Kenakelayan's place ( her parents' actually). So we got to meet the baby goat! Her parents have ventured into the business of rearing goats and cows in their small farm at Paya Pasir, Chenor, Maran. This poor baby goat lost his mum after his delivery and he had to be bottle-fed. Che Ma (kenakelayan's mom) tried forcing another mother-goat to foster and breast-feed him but alas, it seems the concept of fostering is alien in the 'kambing'-dom (to quote kenakelayan) and he was literally 'kicked' out! Thus, they have to bring him back to Kuantan, tying him next to Sox's cage. Expectedly, Sox (an 8 yr old Siamese cat with beautiful big, marble-like eyes, dark brown body and white 'socks' and 'gloves', hence the name Sox) eyed the new addition to the family, with severe suspicions.

I managed to feed Bing Bing (yes, that's Kenakelayan's name for him) with his favorite grass (a cross between lalang and tebrau) and 'curi'curi' stroke his white fur. I can see why Che Ma and Che Pa have fallen in love with these caprine creatures. They are as lovable as cats are! Now if only I can make it lie on my lap, that'll be a difficult feat to accomplish I bet!

As I finished typing this entry, I was starting to feel relieved as the rain began quieting down, pelting its last drop when suddenly, a new thunderous shower began to fall again with shameless vigor!! Ah well, as the saying goes " if you can't beat 'em, join 'em!" So let's snuggle and cuddle up together, with Pashmina shawls, wooly blankets and all! And savor the cool 'wintry' scene, ala Malaysia! Hot cappuccino anyone?

p.s. Latest on the weather condition here: it's still raining and the water level is rising. The small river that meanders through the wetland behind my house has overflowed and whole marsh is filled with a sea of water! Below is the view from Luqman's bedroom. I pray to Allah swt that the water-level won't get worse.

Thursday, November 17, 2005

From A Mother To Her Son

I am afraid I have done undue injustice to my eldest son by associating the term metrosexual with him. Eventhough I did it in jest, I sense his dislike and hurt. Thousand apologies Muhammad! I didn't mean to put you in bad light.

Muhammad is my third offspring and my first boy. So after two girls, it was a relief to find that I finally gave birth to a boy! You see, I come from a family of all girls and I was getting worried that I might follow the same trend. Besides, I had this feeling that ikelah's family was also getting 'fidgety' eventhough no words were spoken in the open. Since both of us are the eldest, it's a natural misconception that we needed at least a boy to 'carry' the family's name, so to speak. But we all know that is not true!

His birth was somewhat special. It was the day for my final clinical professional exams and I was 38 weeks , heavily pregnant with Muhammad. Thought I could go through exams without any hitch. But that was not to be. Early in the morning I detected the first 'show'. I cried! I prayed to Allah swt that everything would be ok. I restricted my movements so as not to accelerate the labour. My exam was in the afternoon. 2 hrs prior, I started having contractions. Mild ones.

I walked slowly to the ward and started examining my patient for the exam. The kind patient commented "you're feverish, are you ok?" I just smiled. The contractions were getting stronger and the lapse shorter. I kept my cool. I had Prof Khalid and an Australian Paediatrician as my examiners and despite my condition, I did well, alhamdulillah. Inside I was burning! Imagine, I was in labour, pain and everything but I had to control or I would lose out! Once over, I almost ran! Ikelah rushed me to Pusrawi and I gave birth to Muhammad an hour later! Phew! Never mind that I got a lashing from the Obstetrician for doing the 'stunt'. I was relieved that the baby was safe! But with a small price though! As I had not prepared the few hours prior to labor in the usual manner, instead of lying down I was standing and delaying the birth to a certain extent, and Muhammad was already 'drilling' his way through the birth canal, this caused him to develop a small 'cephalohematoma' on his scalp! Sorry Muhammad! Could this be the cause of him to be mildly dyslexic when he was small? Wallahu'alam.

Having Muhammad was a great joy! I loved him so much that I even said this once, "I will still continue to love him as much, or perhaps even more, even if I get more children". When I was having a rough time emotionally he protected me in his childish way. You see, as I was still studying, my late MIL (may Allah swt bless her soul) helped me bring up my 2 eldest girls. For this I can't thank her enough. Both MIL and FIL were of great help and they helped ease my burden tremendously. But of course, there was bound to be frictions between us as it involved emotions of love between a doting grandma and her 2 grandchildren. Muhammad helped me through this tumultous period . His caring presence gave me hope that I could still be a good mother. And for that I thank him.

My momentous time with Muhammad would be when I accompanied him to get his SPM results and he turned out to be the best student of his school. Words can't describe the glorious feeling that flowed in my veins that day and that feeling persisted for days! I was in cloud nine! To quote 'kenakelayan' who jokingly asked me ' so are you putting on that silly grin still?' Maybe I was, but who cares how silly I looked! I was simply elated.

Now that he is turning into a fine adult, at times, like all adolescents, he tends to do things that incites the worrying old me. The slightest wrong he does, hurts me. At times like these, I'd reminisce the days that he was the apple of my eye, comforting my injured soul, helping me lick my wound. Those were the days....

To Muhammad, thank you for sticking by me eventhough you were too young to understand anything.You've been my saviour through thick and thin. And remember that I will always be there for you too!

Love, Mak.

p.s. ever had the experience of crying whilst reading your own writing? This one did ....

A Beautiful Bracelet From Istanbul

By now, you should all be familiar with Boogey, my beloved BIL. He used to be a native of Istanbul. He studied and worked there for 16 years. Recently, he went 'balik kampung' to this beautiful, exotic and partly medieval city (how do I know since I haven't been there, you asked? Well, some writers can describe a city beautifully and so far, the vision I get of Istanbul is explicitly breathtaking and I can't wait to set eye on the Blue Mosque....hmm insyallah when my backpacking tour gets kicked off!)

The bracelet above, he bought for me whilst he was there. Rather heavy but I think it's beautiful and eye-catching. And it makes a good conversational piece. So for those easily tongue-tied individuals, take heed. Next time, going for a social meet, wear something extraordinary and you'll have no problem starting a chat!

To Boogey, thank you for remembering me in your travels.

p.s. this bracelet has an exquisite background. Maybe Boogey can enlighten us?

Wednesday, November 16, 2005

What My Birth Date Means

Your Birthdate: February 18

You are a cohesive force - able to bring many people together for a common cause.

You tend to excel in work situations, but you also facilitate a lot of social gatherings too.

Beyond being a good leader, you are good at inspiring others.

You also keep your powerful emotions in check - you know when to emote and when to repress.

Your strength: Emotional maturity beyond your years

Your weakness: Wearing yourself down with too many responsibilities

Your power color: Crimson red

Your power symbol: Snowflake

Your power month: September

Got this from ubisetela's blog (cilok!)

Friday, November 11, 2005

My Grousing Thoughts

Actually, we have just lived in this present house since last April, so it hasn't been a year yet. This place we're living in is in a transition sort of phase. Originally it is a village, a fishing village to be specific. It is situated less than 5 km from town. Probably I can class it as an urban sprawl. It is a big kampung with many empty lands belonging to various family heirloom. So since the older generations have passed away and their children preferring to live elsewhere, we see these lands being sold to housing developers and turning them into housing estates. So we have modern homes situated awkwardly in the midst of wooden kampung-style houses. And we have an urbanized society living in a backdrop of simple minded and very laid-back folks. Now, this contrasting and contradicting socio-economic scenario can raise a helluva problem if we don't take proactive and cautious measure. I, for one, am already feeling the heat of the rather unbalanced social strata between the original kampung people and the 'migrating' society. After the many occurences of thefts (iKelah's 1k bicycle, our Turkish Angora cat, iKelah's working shoes and today 2 small kids blatantly snitched our cute kitten right under our noses), some minor disturbances and the recent car accident, I am begining to question whether we have made the correct choice of moving here.

I am beginning to notice how the youngsters here behave. How they spend their free-time, idling around, speeding away on their motorbikes, without helmets, embracing the couldn't-care-less attitude to the fullest. They are so simple-minded and I am sure they treat their school education lightly. Most of these youngsters will grow up acquiring menial jobs that don't require any basic qualifications at all.

This laid-back attitude too must have some contribution to their affinity towards drug addiction. Yes, this area that I now call home is the 'sarang' or 'lubuk' for drug-addicts. The fact that it's a fishing village doubles the inclination as it's rampant amongst fishermen to indulge in drug addiction especialy when they are at sea.

You see, here we are, the urbanized migrants, trying to assimilate ourselves amongst the kampung folks, trying to be nice to them but alas, many of them have pre-concieved thoughts about us. Us, living in nice brick houses and driving big cars may prove too much for them and hence magnifying their envy towards us. I fear if these envious emotions are not being curbed , they would resolve into a certain form of retaliation.

The question is, is there any way to make these people more civilized, to transform their way of thinking, to change their laid-back attitude and to empower themselves? This is so crucial as I believe these people are the bulk of the Malay nation. We shouldn't be ashamed to admit that these people exist amongst us. We shouldn't chose to ignore this problem, sweeping it under the carpet. Our 'great' politicians should buck up and do something more concrete and stop lip-servicing. They shouldn't 'make use' or abuse these people just for the sake of winning elections. These people are not just numbers and statistics to make a certain political party win elections (once, you've won the election, you simply ignore these people's presence). These are humans which make or break a society and more importantly, a country. Neglecting their livelihood, especially in giving good, relevant and practical education to their young generation will definitely lead to a downfall of our malay nation. And one glaring mistake and injustice done to these kampung folks is implementing Maths and Science education in English. If they have grave problem understanding Science and Maths in Malay, can the education minister explain how can they understand them at all, in English?? Do you know that many of the rural teachers have resorted into translating word by word to make these poor kids understand? How time consuming and surely, surely exhausting! Our Malay society is bogged down with these two serious issues and we need to address them urgently, namely, drug addiction and a deteriorating education system. *sorry for this digression*

So here I am, stuck, with a sense of non-belonging. Living a 'global' life (or should I use 'glocal'? But honestly I still haven't worked out its true meaning and what the DPM really meant by it) in a kampung that I find hard to blend in.....

My World In A Handbag

I was spring-cleaning my hand-bag just now and boy, the things that I keep in it! Wanna know what they are? My pink purse given by iFos (and this contains endless odds and ends as well!), a copy of al Mathurat, a small book of Asma ul husna, a copy of Juzz Amma, a copy of Surah2 amalan, my reading glasses (yes I need them to see near ~shows I'm that old!), all kinds of pretty pens given by drug-reps, my handset, medicated creams, an embroidered sachet filled with 2 lipsticks which I seldom wear, plaster-bands (songlap dari klinik, hehe), zipper-bag filled with panadols, maxalon (for fever, headache and travelling sickness), bits of papers with my clinic schedules written on them, my bank book.....

Off and on, this bag of mine also carries CDs, socks, tasbih ....if I could, I would stuff in my telekung as well but then I fear what the 'RSPCH' would do to me...what's RSPCH you ask? It's the Royal Society of Prevention of Cruelty to Handbags!

Quoting a male partner I had during varsity days who were always next to me in my lab classes, who would rummage through my huge pencil case for things he needed, "waahh, you have everything in here...only minus the kitchen sink!!" Zainal Azim (that's his name) if you are reading this, eat your heart out!! ( the odds that he would is as slim as having George Bush reading this blog!!)

Now, wait till I tell you what I keep and carry in my Tote, everyday, to work! I carry tonnes of books just in case I need to read them! Hehe....iKelah would nag me relentlessly regarding this bag as he finds it a sore-eye whenever he uses the car...sorry!

So to my female bloggers, what do you keep in your handbags?? Anything good?

Wednesday, November 09, 2005


I don't know how to describe how today has been for me. Has it been bad? Has it been good? I don't know. The good thing is I fasted today, alhamdulillah. But what disturbed me are the things that occured within a short span of time, infact it was within 3 hrs! These things may be classed as small tragedies, depending on how you view them in their own perspectives.

I started working in the morning in the main clinic which means loads and loads of patients, alone! (usually it takes 2 doctors to cover the load but since some are still on raya leave, I have to bear the brunt alone!). Anyway after few antenatals, some ultrasounds, an Incision and Drainage (of left axilla- ouch, damn painful despite tonnes of Ethyl Chloride spray!) and endless URTIs, I managed to end the morning 5 minutes late! Rushed home for a short afternoon break and mingle with ikelah who happened to also spend his short break at home.

2pm, rushed back to the same clinic and began another marathon. 3pm, whilst engaging in doctor-patient consultation, the assistant interupted, "ada emergency doctor". I rushed next door. Saw a man bending over his already ashen-faced wife on the trolley. She was already gasping and breathing erratically, almost unconscious. One glance and I knew, death is at her door. But I need to resuscitate anyway.

Checked her pulse, can't feel. Pupils fixed and almost dilated. BP is unrecordable. Gasping. Opened her mouth, saw a white pill on her tongue, must be sublingual GTN. Reminded the husband to teach her the syahadah. Masked and bagged and proceeded with CPR. Tried to set IV line but all her veins were small and wirey and already collapsed. Gave her I/V adrenaline 1 ampoule but still the same.

Finally, 3.30pm, failed resuscation and pronounced her dead. Comforted the husband. I know I shouldn't have let him in the room during the resus but this clinic has been so patient-friendly that their kids can sit on my chair and tap the keyboard if they wanted to!

I was so drained out after that, I can't even manage to whole mind was covered with intense sorrow....

Finished at 5pm and rushed home. Promised mak (who is here) to go to Mak Teh's for tea. At 6pm, we started out. Barely 100 meters away, the accident occured. I was on the left side minding my own way. There were 5-6 motorcyclists hogging , idling, on the right side, none with helmets. Suddenly one of them who were facing the wrong way, swerved his bike to the left. right into my car! Bham!! His bike half went under and got stuck underneath. He managed to get up and limped a bit. I dare not go out fearing the damage he has done to my car. His pal asked me to reverse to let go off the bike. Stupidly, I followed. In the midst of confusion, the culprit got away, leaving us aghast. We tried to call them back but in vain. Worst still, we didn't get his plate number.

The question is, should I make a police report? I called the traffic seargent and he said since I don't have the plate number, the only insurance I can claim is my own! Which is not worth the trouble. Even then, if I had his number, I doubt that his bike is insured at all! So either way I lose!

The damage? My front number-plate is broken into pieces. The right-side lamp is broken. The front bumper has a hole on the right side . Estimation? I don't know. (maybe I should take pics of the damages and post it here, eh?)

So how would you describe my day?

I can't write long for this entry. My car was just being hit by a bike ridden by one of the many reckless kampung boys here.. I didn't manage to get his registration number and he sped away guiltlessly.Feel so down. Ironically I just commented on Nurelhuda's site regarding acceptance and redha. So this is Allah's test for me. Salams everyone!

Saturday, November 05, 2005


We reached the hotel lobby 10 minutes before 3pm. Called his secretary and waited patiently albeit nervous like a rat. Why should I be nervous. you asked? Subhanallah, I was going to meet a person who had ranked himself amongst the great names. I could be meeting a great malay politician or a popular singer or TV personality who has so much time in his hand to blog and be amicable with adolecsent bloggers including my own daughter! What if he was a royalty, I toyed with the idea? Gosh, what should I address him as?

Then, I saw his 'secretary'. He was supposed to wear green baju melayu, sampin and songkok. But this very young guy, in fact, a boy, was wearing something bluish, no sampin and no songkok. 'Betul ke ni? Nekad je la' I approached him and when near, he looked so much like Hiyoshi. 'Hiyoshi?', I asked. 'No' he replied crisply. So, we followed him. Along the way, I tried my best to extricate whatever info I can from this rather cool and overly-composed guy.

'Who is he really?, I asked. 'Is he really a famous personality as claimed?' 'No, I was strictly told not to reveal anything and save it for the last minute' he replied nonchalantly, straight face. 'Who else has arrived?' 'No one else'. Ok, this is one tough fellow. He won't budge.

We took the lift and walked to the next wing and took another lift. Really felt like in the 'Get Smart' series. And finally we reached THE room!

Ta Da!! The door opened and there HE was with his beautiful beloved! Our very own Pycnogenol! Aghast, I stepped into the room dazed! It was so surreal! Finally I come face to face with this person who had encouraged me to blog, who continued to keep us guessing who he really is and who is forever leaving sweet and positive comments wherever he goes.

We were the first to arrive. So we had sometime warming up (despite the air-con we were probably flustered up primarily due to excitement and some degree of embarrassment). We managed to do some reminiscing about our entries and placing things into certain perspectives, now that we have got to know everyone in person.

Next, came Nurelhuda with 3 of her children. We hugged like we've known for years! I didn't get to ask her but I bet she felt like it was a dream too cause she sure looked confused! Incidentally, I met my mom's neighbour earlier on who on probing turned out to be Nurelhuda's cousin! What a small, small world! (unlike Mawi's of course!)

Hiyoshi being Hiyoshi had tried to pull a grandiose entrance but unfortunately his entrance went slightly unnoticed :) heheh. Sorry! This rather contradicts your version eh? Anyway one is entitled to their own version isn't it?!

Inositol came last, alone. She remains her enigmatic self :). We too hugged like we've known each other ages. She does have some semblance to Ida Nerina, her wide eyes especially, :). Minah kilang or not, she is someone I can reckon with anytime!

Surprisingly we had no problem finding topics to discuss. Pycnogenol as expected turned out to be a magnificent host. Nurelhuda is as Hiyoshi has described: as deep as her entries! :)) but I could understand her better in person unlike her entries which I might take many re-reads to fully understand!

Actually Hiyoshi came with his parents and siblings. He sat next to me and we managed to make small talk. I found him a shy person who had to be provoked to finally open up. And seriously, his writings are more 'extrovert' than what he really is! :)) After that short meet, I gathered that he was doing quite well in his studies and insyallah you'll make a good doctor, Hiyoshi!

'Ok, ok, skip the details', I can hear you guys grumbling. 'We already know what you ate'. Hiyoshi has made a good job in describing the food served (It's as though he had prepared the food himself! ). 'Please stop the suspense!' 'So who is this PYCNOGENOL please!' Oklah guys I know how it feels to be stuck in an abysmal passage of guessing game. Why it nearly left me bald from scratching my non-itchy head ! So you really want to know who this mysterious fella is? Click the comment page!

Tuesday, November 01, 2005


















Saturday, October 29, 2005


Pernah tak anda mengalami keadaan ini : anda menulis sesuatu di blog samada suatu entri maupun komen, lantas disalah-ertikan oleh pembaca yang lain? Terus, dibalas dengan komen yang amat pedas sehingga pilu rasa nun di lubuk hati? Jika pernah, apa tindakan anda? Lawan balik komen yang menyakitkan itu atau delete komen 'gila' itu atau buat tidak faham saja seolah-olah komen itu tidak wujud di alam maya ini (read: anda balas komen-komen lain tapi sengaja 'skip' yang satu tu)?

Saya pernah mengalaminya sekali dan 'terserempak' beberapa kali di blog-blog lain iaini berlaku kepada pembaca lain. Beberapa ketika dahulu, saya telah menulis komen saya di blog kawan (saya sudah anggapnya sebagai kawan walaupun belum pernah bersua muka ). Entah macam mana komen saya yang saya rasa cukup senang difahami bahasanya itu telah disalah tafsirkan oleh seorang pembaca ini. Apa lagi dia terus melenting mengutuk saya. Komennya itu telah menuduh saya seperti katak bawah tempurung, tidak tahu dunia luar. Mujurlah ada kawan saya tuan empunya blog itu yang pandai menenangkan hati pembaca itu. Sejuk hatinya. Dan saya? Saya buat senyap sahaja tidak pon balas komennya itu.Cuba bayang kalau saya layan nafsu marah saya? Mahu meletup papan komen tu! hehehe

Sekali tu, saya terbaca di papan komen di sebuah blog yang sering saya singgah. 'A' memberi komen awal. 'B' memberi komen kedua sambil mengusik tuan empunya blog. Entah macam mana, 'A' ingat 'B' perli dirinya (saya pon tak faham macam mana 'A' boleh perasan sampai begitu sebab sekali baca saya dah tahu yg 'B' hanya mengusik tuan blog) lantas 'A' terus 'sembur' 'B' dengan soalan yang pedas. Ish ish. Kenalah si 'B' menerangkan keadaan sebenar. Baik hati 'B'. Kalau ikut saya, buat 'dek' saja.

Yang terbaru saya terbaca komen di blog kawan saya, seorang ni 'C' mengadu yang dia berasa kecil hati kerana seolah-olah komen nya tidak boleh diterima-pakai di blog 'D'. Ceritanya begini: 'D' buat entri yang 'C' tidak berapa faham bahasa dan maksudnya sehingga 'C' menegur 'D' sambil mempertikaikan perubahan pada stail bahasa dan makna yang mendalam sehingga 'C' tidak boleh ikutinya. 'D' pulak mungkin ada sedikit kurang senang di atas sikap 'C' lalu menulis satu entri khas tentang hal ini dan seolah-olah menuding jari kepada 'C'. Apalagi, merajuk lah si 'C' membawa diri ke blog kawan saya dengan nada sedih membuat satu 'ultimatum' iaitu: kalau dirinya dirasai tidak diperlukan lagi, beritahu sajalah maka dia akan berdiam diri tanpa meninggalkan apa-apa komen lagi.:) Yang terkini tadi saya singgah di blog 'D' dan dapat dia sudah delete entri yang dimaksudkan itu. Baguslah begitu. Alhamdulillah. Jadi bila 'C' masuk blog 'D' dan nampak yang entri itu sudah dihapuskan, maka sejuklah hatinya agaknya.Harap-harap begitulah.

Pada sesiapa yang terasa yang mereka mungkin 'A', 'B', 'C' atau 'D' yang saya maksudkan, harap maafkan saya ya! Tapi yang pasti 'C' dan 'D' tidak pernah ke blog saya ni, ngeh ngeh ngeh!

Itulah cerita A,B,C dan D dalam alam maya ini. Kelakar ada. Sedih pon ada. Pengajarannya? Kita tidak boleh melulu membuat kesimpulan setelah membaca sesuatu komen. Kalau tidak setuju, komenlah secara berkhemah. Jaga adab dan tatasusila. Walaupon bukan didepan muka, namun hati tetap terasa bila bahasa mengusik jiwa. Ceh wah!


Images courtesy of iKelah

Thursday, October 27, 2005

Latest From Balakot

26/10/05 11.55pm: Masa di sini dah 2 strong tremor and 3 minor. Kesemuanya cause landslide and sinking of roads. 1 strong and 2 weak at camp. The rest we were at Mansehra. I am in moble team. Dr Wan stays in camp tx and dressings. I make contacts with ither NGO. Main route Naran Road, travel 15 km, 5 km short to Kawai, blocked, major landslide. Help Al Khidmat with clinic. Supply tents, shawls n donate power generator.

26/10/05 ,9pm: Hari ni tak gi moble ke Kawai. Stayed at camp and distribute tents. Berebut tapi ada yg kita tak beri sebab utamakan yg dari gunung, mereka jalan more than 2 days nak reache Balakot for help. Area ni 80K to 100K families homeless. 1 family ada 8 to 10 members. Supply makan ok. tents tak cukup. Winter ni tak tahu la nak shelter kat mana. Skang main share khemah. Budak2 pon turun gunung tlg family cari khemah etc. Tak da tremor hari ini. Debu kuat dari landslide.

27/10/05, 3.55 am: Pagi ni nak ke Batgram and Alai. Tgh hari ke Balakot semula utk distribute tents. Air muka ceria bebenor bila dpt tent. Depa ni jln in grps bila balik ke mountains sbb ada rimau kawasan tu. Sini subuh kol 5 am. Iftar kol 5.30pm. Sini banyak Bakri. Kita kerap bebakri kat sini. Getting cloder esp at nite. Hari tu hujan. Ada snow kat mountain. Air dia sejuk gila even siang esp kalau tak kena sun.

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

Help! My Mom's A Cheapskate!

I am a cheapskate to the highest degree! iFos once told me, 'Mak ni cheapskate la!' You see, when I buy things, I don't do it compulsively out of sheer urge. I'd look around, compare prices, weigh everything out and would settle for the cheapest but with optimal quality. It could take me few days to decide buying something pricey.

For instance, buying a book. I simply love Grisham. His court drama and it's intricacies are phenomenal. His is a truly un-put-downable, page-turner, gotta-finish-whatever-happens and all the bombastic phrases used by book-praisers to make them best-sellers. So each time, he writes a new book, I'd be looking out for it. For my birthday 2 years ago my 2 eldest daughter forked out 80 bucks from their duit raya just to buy me a new-realeased hard cover of Grisham's King Of Torts. "Thanks I said but why waste on hard-covers?" I lamented, sounding almost like an ungrateful prig. "Laa, mak. It's Grisham, your favorite author and it's your birthday! Why not a hard-cover for keepsake?'
'Well, you could have gotten me something else worth the 80 ringgit. I can wait for the paper-back', I quipped. 'But Mak, when you love reading something, how can you wait?' argued iFos. 'I can wait. It's not as if the books will run out of stock or something', I answered quick. Knowing iFos, I can't never win in such debates. iFos, queen of I-must-have-the-new-release- editions-or-I'll-die-of-shame! When JK Rowlings were about to release her recent book, The Half-blood Prince, iFos made a pre-order at Kinokuniya. Never mind that it is expensive (to my cheapskate standard anyway). The only consolation? You get a H.P.'s magic wand for free. Yeah, like you can do anything magical with it, eh! And her sister too bought another hard-cover of the same edition. Why do we need 2 hard-covers of the same thing, I asked myself. Why do we need to make JK Rowlings rich when she has problems addressing her wealth and fame? Beats me.

Once in a bookstore, we saw some paperbacks of the old Harry Potter and L.O.T.R. editions at half the price of the original edition. 'Wow!' I exclaimed, 'you should have waited for these, they're super cheap!' 'Mak! I can't wait 1 year for that! That's uncalled for!' she cried bewilderedly. 'What am I to say when friends discuss about the books?' 'Well, I can wait if it means only paying half the price,' the old cheapskate retorted. I don't care if I look dumb when people discuss about what happens to Harry or his friends in his latest book.

That's why I love sales! I just love the 70%, 50%,20% cut signs. It just give me sheer satisfaction when buying discounted items. Feeling smug, it's as though I have accomplished something out of this world!

My eldest son is truly brand-conscious. iFos has labeled him as being in the league of metrosexuals. Where did he get that streak from I wonder? Here I am a cheapskate and I have a son who is the complete opposite of me! Everything must be original labels! Even cars! Cars must be BMWs! Once I was admiring the new Volks beetle. When I found out that one costs a whopping (almost) 200k, I resignedly said, 'Apalah mahal sangat. Not worth it'. And he frustratingly responded, ' Mak, if you love it, you have to go for it!' 'I might as well get an MPV of about the same price. Can fit more people!' was my cheapskate response.

Sometimes I make jokes regarding his obsessions for brands. Once, I was buying titbits for him to bring back to college during the Ramadhan. I was picking up some Oreo biscuits when I accidentally picked another brand 'Stereo' or something, heheh. He looked at me, astounded. 'Why did you pick that for?'. 'I thought you like Oreos?' I replied. When he pointed the name, only then I realized it was different. 'Laa, biscuits, all taste the same what?' Talk about brand-conscious!

Even Luqman, my youngest, is starting to show his disagreement with my 'cheapskateness'. 'Mak, belilah yang mahal sikit. Elok lagi!' Why do people think that when it is expensive then it must be good? Well, my kids do!

I don't know. Am I doing this because of trying to practice 'zuhud-ness'? But then my son will give me a different interpretation of zuhud. So the best term for my 'appalling' behavior in my kids' eyes is 'cheapskate'. Are you too?

Monday, October 24, 2005

Latest From Balakot

24/10/05 4pm local time-
Assalamualaikum. Berbuka di Balakot. Makan roti homemade. Tadi tengok camp di Kawai, 15 km uphill, sejuk. Sini buka pukul 5.35 . Pukul 7 meeting. Buka apa? Balakot is the worst hit area- 100% flattened.

Sunday, October 23, 2005


If you're wondering why I'm entering this post at this ridiculous hour, it's because I can't sleep. Why can't I sleep?. Probably it's the tea plus the pseudoepinephrine which I took for my blocked nose just now. Probably it's because my friend from US just called and we had a conversation that pointed out that I might be doing a lot of bida'ah in my daily practice. Probably I'm thinking about you-know-who.

I just contracted this flu from my daughter who is beginning to get better. So when I was driving to work tonight at 8pm, I was praying for it to be a quiet night. It was raining softly. That's a good sign. The patients were trickling slowly and when it was 9.15pm,everything was quiet and I thought I could go home on time. At 9.25 I packed my bag, switched off the PC, aircon and headed for the front door when the assistant told me "doctor ada emergency, luka besar di dagu". Oh no! Back in. Entered the ER.

"Darah lagi ke atau dah berhenti?" I asked the assistant. ' Ada sikit-sikit lagi". I examined the child and applied pressure to the laceration wound hoping the bleeding would cease and I could just administer the Glustich and send her home pronto. Oh God please make it stop I prayed. But the wound was too deep and the blood still oozing albeit very minimally. To stitch or not? Hmm patience got the better of me. So I said, "jahit, jahit!'

'Keluar dressing set, draw lignocaine, ambil nylon 5.0" I demanded fast. So I began suturing her up. 'Kena jahit rapat-rapat sebab di muka dan ni budak perempuan , nanti tak lawa, kesian dia, kalau lelaki tak pe la, :)" I said to the assistant half-joking (about the lelaki part i.e.), explaining, meaning we might get off a bit late. Anyway I've seen kids with scars looking like a fish-bone fossils, smacked right across the face! Poor kids having to grow up looking like a pirate wanabe! 'Ok siap' I told the poor kid. 'Lain kali jangan main lompat-lompat atas katil malam-malam hari!"

Anyway, I managed to settle fast and rushed home, hoping to pray Isya' and Terawikh in time and sleep early. But after Isya' prayers, I got the phone-call and here I am, stuck, eyes wide open! *sigh*

Saturday, October 22, 2005

Messages From Balakot

A camp in Balakot
21.10.06- Arrived at Abottabad at 8 am. Proceed straight to Muzzafarabad via Mansehra. Arrived at 11 am, then off to Balakot. Damage at Balakot more than Muazzafarabad though the latter had more casualties due to denser population.
22.10.06- 7 am, ke kedai cari khemah, terus ke Balakot, klinik macam biasa. Then 15km jln kr Naran. Last stop at Kola, understanding dgn Jamiat untuk mobile ke Kg on foot. Ada 150 families. All well here except SIraj who is down with A.G.E. At the moment, khemah keperluan utama.
22.10.06-5pm. Buka apa hari ni? At army camp cari Malaysian grp. Sihat semua?

Friday, October 21, 2005


GPM hantar sukarelawan kedua bantu mangsa gempa

KUALA LUMPUR 20 Okt. - Misi kedua sukarelawan Global Peace Mission Malaysia (GPM) berlepas ke Lahore hari ini untuk ke Mansehra bagi meneruskan kerja-kerja bantuan kemanusiaan sehingga 31 Oktober ini.
Pengerusi GPM, Ahmad Azam Abdul Rahman berkata, tiga sukarelawan yang diketuai oleh Dr. Azmi Mohd Ghazali ini akan memberi bantuan kecemasan dan perubatan kepada mangsa gempa bumi di Balakot dan kawasan perkampungan di sekitarnya.
Katanya, misi pertama sukarelawan GPM yang berlepas pada 13 Oktober lalu telah berjaya merawat 150 mangsa yang mana 70 peratus daripada mereka mengalami luka kecederaan dan patah tulang.
``Hampir 80 peratus struktur bangunan dan rumah telah musnah dan cuaca sejuk tambahan pula dengan hujan telah menyukarkan aktiviti bantuan.
``Vaksin anti-tetanus adalah amat diperlukan selain ubat-ubatan lain, khemah, pakaian sejuk dan selimut,'' katanya dalam satu kenyataan di sini, hari ini.
Menurut Ahmad Azam, misi ketiga sukarelawan GPM dijangka berlepas ke Pakistan selepas Aidilfitri bagi mengenal pasti projek bantuan jangkamasa panjang termasuk bantuan khusus untuk anak-anak yatim akibat gempa tersebut.
Sehubungan itu, GPM memohon bantuan masyarakat Malaysia untuk menghulurkan sumbangan khususnya bantuan kewangan untuk mangsa gempa bumi di Asia Selatan ini.
``GPM mengambil kesempatan mengucap terima kasih kepada rakyat Malaysia yang telah memberikan sumbangan ikhlas bagi menjayakan misi bantuan kemanusiaan anjuran kami sebelum ini,'' katanya.
Sementara itu, sumbangan kewangan boleh disalurkan terus ke akaun GPM (Bank Islam: 14-023-01-002922-4).
Bagi sumbangan melalui khidmat pesanan ringkas (SMS), orang ramai boleh taipkan GPM2 untuk sumbangan RM2, GPM5 untuk sumbangan RM5 dan GPM10 untuk sumbangan RM10 dan hantarkan kepada 39111.
Untuk maklumat lanjut, orang ramai boleh menghubungi sekretariat GPM di talian 03-61888409.

Daily Journal:
20/10/05- iKelah (head of second mission)reached Lahore at 1.00am local time. Headed straight to Islamabad by bus, 4 hrs journey. Then 45 min to Mansehra (probably 4x4).

21/10/05- 1st and 2nd mission met at Abbottabad at 8.10 am. Then straight to Muzaffarabad. Camp at Muzafarrabad.


Yesterday in between patients, I peeked out of the room to watch the live telecast of the burial ceremony of our late first lady. Through out, I was observing how calm and composed our PM was . Yes, I thought, he was trying to put a tough front to maintain his integrity as a country leader. But at the same I was sure he would cry in private as I've heard a lot of his love for Puan Sri.

Today I saw this picture in one of the tabloid. Yes, he couldn't control his tears anymore. The thoughts of not having her around him anymore and the loneliness, must be so overwhelming to have opened the dam and let go the flood of tears...

It's ok Paklah. This picture shows the human side of you, your compassion and your gentleness. We will still respect you as a leader.

May Allah s.w.t give peace to her soul and give him the strength to carry on. Insyallah.

Wednesday, October 19, 2005


In his latest entry, Hiyoshi lamented on the many mysterious things that he has observed and noted mentally. I know I have adviced him to ignore these inexplainable things that cross our paths and not let our mind be boggled by them, however, I have also at times come face to face with these 'clueless' events which sometimes almost culminate to absurdity. But I don't dwell so much on them, only wanting to share them with you :)

Why do my face gets itchy immediately after I put on the disposable gloves to perform a procedure?

Why do my patients instantly turn their faces to the right when I instruct them to face the left?

Why do my physiological intestinal/rectal response prefer to perform its utmost action (by discharging its gas) once I have performed my ablution for prayers?

Why do my patients chose to exhale forcefully into my face when I just request them to say a simple 'aaah'?

Why do women drivers get labeled as bad drivers when there are many men too who drive just as bad?

How come I never see the public toilets for handicapped being used at all? What happens if we the non-handicapped use them? Or what happens if we act handicapped and use them?

Why is there no MPH, Kinokuniya or TIMES in Kuantan? We only have Popular, MBS and Hamid Brothers to search for books and most of the time, the book selections are nothing to be desired.

So you see Hiyoshi, I too, have an inquisitive mind but I don't give a hoot if I don't get any answers for the above 'mysteries'. :))

I want to share this lovely meaningful poem (maybe you've all heard it before)

By Author Unknown

Be thankful
that you don't already have everything you desire.
If you did, what would there be to look forward to?

Be thankful
when you don't know something,
for it gives you the opportunity to learn.

Be thankful
for the difficult times.
During those times you grow.

Be thankful
for your limitations,
because they give you opportunities for improvement.

Be thankful for each new challenge,
because it will build your strength and character.

Be thankful for your mistakes.
They will teach you valuable lessons.

Be thankful when you're tired and weary,
because it means you've made a difference.

It's easy to be thankful for the good things.
A life of rich fulfillment comes to those who are also thankful for the setbacks.
Gratitude can turn a negative into a positive.
Find a way to be thankful for your troubles, and they can become your blessings

Sunday, October 16, 2005


Some pigeons have decided to nest on the roof above my bedroom toilet! It has been quite sometime since I realized this but have ignored it simply for the fact that they haven't caused much disturbances. Till a week ago, when I start hearing the noisy chirping of baby birds!!

Initially the noise was only occasional. Sometimes I would hear the 'cooing' sound of a pigeon. Have you ever heard of the sound? It's sort of a rumbling, low-to-medium pitch sound and often goes into crescendos. At other times, I could hear a sudden loud thud, made by the bird's feet when landing on the ceiling board (a mini version of the sound of airplane tyres touching the ground when landing). So it was acceptable and I kept mum about it.

Nowadays the noise coming from the ceiling boards are getting more intense and at times irritating. So annoying that I felt like taking a pole and hit the boards, just to scare them off. Each time I go to the loo, I could hear, relentless chirping sounds of baby birds, probably with their beaks wide open, waiting for mother pigeon to pop in bits of morsels into their mouths. At the same time, these are accompanied by exasperating sounds of birds' feet scratching and thudding busily on the roof floor-boards.

The other day, I called iKelah to prove to him that it's time to get rid of the pigeons. There is already some musty smell emitting from the roof. And there are brownish marks which are getting bigger on the white ceiling boards. These stains are probably made by their secretions. "We have to call someone to 'relocate' these pigeons" I said. And also to clean the roof. "Tunggulah anak-anak burung tu besar sikit" was his reply. "Hmm.." I replied. Well, it's true. If we got rid of them, would the babies survive? Especially now with the rainy and stormy weather.

Meantime, i have to bear with their chirpings, thuddings and scratchings and wait patiently for the babies to learn how to fly!

Talking about birds and nests, I recently contemplated on my own 'nest'. 3 of my eldest children have now left home, two studying abroad and one preparing to. I am currently left with two school-going kids at home. But if Luqman gets lucky to enter any boarding school next year and Aliah the year after next, that just leaves me,ikelah and the maid. And since house-hold chores would be less by then, I see no apparent reason to keep the maid. So that'll leave me and ikelah. And then my thoughts delved further. And when ikelah is on call at night, that will leave me all alone at home, at night, in a fairly isolated housing area, near the sea!! Arghhh!! No!!! I confided this to Luqman and this had him thinking. Later he asked me "are you ok with me going to boarding school? If not, I'll just stay at home" :) Felt sad and happy the same time. Sad because one day all my kids will eventually leave home, like what I did to my own parents. Happy because my smallest son is growing into a thoughtful person who worries about me being alone at home!

P.S Tonight out of habit I clicked on iFos' site and lo and behold I found that she had entered a new post. Well, well, I see someone has been busy at her blog and didn't ever e-mail me anything yet! tsk tsk.

Bukit Tinggi 2008

Great Wall 2009

Followers the garden of memory grows arid... | Creative Commons Attribution- Noncommercial License | Dandy Dandilion Designed by Simply Fabulous Blogger Templates